Corrupt My Wish

[Mister Tee]

Granted, you are getting a "Snoop Dogg/Too $hort mix" solid for the next two days instead. Welcome to my 'hood.

 

 

 

I wish it were time to go home now, and it's only morning.

[Huzband]

I wish it were time to go home now, and it's only morning.

 

 

Granted, but now YOU'VE got to ride through that wintery mix on your commute home. All 80 miles of it.

 

I wish people that left this country because they didn't like our form of gubment/lifestyle would stop bitchin' about same.

[BFish]

I wish it were time to go home now, and it's only morning.

 

 

Granted, but now YOU'VE got to ride through that wintery mix on your commute home. All 80 miles of it.

 

I wish people that left this country because they didn't like our form of gubment/lifestyle would stop bitchin' about same.

 

granted...! don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.

 

i wish i was as mechanically inclined as some of the bmwst members.

[Mister Tee]

Granted, but you can't bust out of those steel brackets so you can stand up straight.

 

 

 

I wish I had more options for lunch here.

[ltljohn]

I wish I had more options for lunch here.

 

Granted. but they all came from the strangest things you ever ate thread.

 

I wish I had a heated garage so I could spend more time with my bike

[Huzband]

I wish I had a heated garage so I could spend more time with my bike

 

Granted, but Glenda saw this, so now you have to live in the garage, & you don't have visitation either.

 

I wish I had an air conditioned garage, so I could spend more time with my bikes. ( Laura Lee does too, so that corrupt won't fly.)

[Matts_12GS]

I wish I had an air conditioned garage, so I could spend more time with my bikes. ( Laura Lee does too, so that corrupt won't fly.)

 

Granted, but you had to give me the big TV you have in the garage so now you have to go in the house while greasy/sweaty/etc from bike bonding to watch the tide roll in the "Also Ran Bowl"

 

I wish the A$$hat that wrote the Harley bashing article in the ON this month had just shut up and quit his whining

[Mister Tee]

Granted, but Phyllis Diller and Cloris Leachman decide to partner up and buy a used, '84 softtail Harley. After pieces of it fall off as they ride it home, they decide to co-author a Harley bashing article of their own. When you write a letter to the editor to complain, the letter gets forwarded to them, and they hunt you down and perform various taped sex acts with you, while Chuck Norris films the three of you with his video camera. The moderators of BMWST are so amused by the video that they allow it to remain on the site for eternity.

 

 

 

I wish Winter was over with.

[Matts_12GS]

Granted, but Phyllis Diller and Cloris Leachman decide to partner up and buy a used, '84 softtail Harley. After pieces of it fall off as they ride it home, they decide to co-author a Harley bashing article of their own. When you write a letter to the editor to complain, the letter gets forwarded to them, and they hunt you down and perform various taped sex acts with you, while Chuck Norris films the three of you with his video camera. The moderators of BMWST are so amused by the video that they allow it to remain on the site for eternity.

 

I just hope we do it to the Snoop/Too short Christmas mix! Lodi Dodi, we likes to party....

[Mister Tee]

Granted, all of the BMWST members must endure the Snoop/Too $hort Christmas mix until March of next year.

 

 

 

I wish I had a magic button on my bike that would make my immediate surroundings a constant 75 degrees and dry, regardless of the outside conditions.

[RevRay]

 

I wish I had a magic button on my bike that would make my immediate surroundings a constant 75 degrees and dry, regardless of the outside conditions.

 

 

Granted now your a biker in a bubble.

 

 

I like to wish you all a happy/merry holiday season with a bright new year.

[ltljohn]

 

 

 

 

RevRay

 

I like to wish you all a happy/merry holiday season with a bright new year.

 

Granted but you will be poor and in bad health so you will have to move in with Cloris, Phyllis and Bea who will demand favors to pay your room and board.

 

 

I wish the roads weren't covered with ice wet cinders so I could ride a bit today.

[Mister Tee]

Granted. Now the cinders are dry and combustible, and you receive third degree burns riding through them. While hospitalized, Cloris, Phyllis and Richard Simmons pay you a visit to the hospital, and you are forced to perform disgusting sex acts to '80's aerobic workout video music while the event is podcast to your place of work on the new 52-inch flat screen in the executive boardroom.

 

 

I wish tomorrow was Saturday or Sunday, and not Monday.

[ltljohn]

I wish tomorrow was Saturday or Sunday, and not Monday.

 

Granted, tomorrow is Sunday as is the next day and the next...I got you babe is on the radio every morning and you wake up with Phyllis, Cloris, Bea and Richard Simmons.

 

I wish that ad that promised I could be 3 inches longer would have referred to my legs so I could flat foot my RT

[Mister Tee]

Granted, both your legs are now three inches longer. I won't say where the other six inches came from, but let's just say you're never going to have a need to lift the seat from here on out.

 

 

I wish I was sunning myself on an Aussie beach right now. You know, the kind where they say tops come off.

[Kitsap]

 

 

I wish I was sunning myself on an Aussie beach right now. You know, the kind where they say tops come off.

 

Granted, but all the tops were covering escapees from a raisin farm.

 

I wish I had room in the garage for both the RT and a GSA.

[Lynn]

I wish I had room in the garage for both the RT and a GSA.

 

Granted-but they are both scale models just slightly too small to be ridden.

 

I wish my husband had been willing to run away to Vegas for the holiday, rather than staying here in the snow.

 

[Mister Tee]

Granted, he's in Vegas, sipping a tall one with a blonde named Desiree. You, on the other hand, are shoveling snow, and even Renaldo the gardener doesn't have time for you.

 

 

 

I wish I were sipping a tall one with a sister named Desiree right now....

[Huzband]

I wish I were sipping a tall one with a sister named Desiree right now....

 

Granted, but she's your sister, so that's as far as it goes.

 

I wish we had snow to go with this cold weather, & that it wasn't going to be 70 for Christmas.

[BFish]

granted, but you live in melbourne, fl and it will be 80.

 

i wish my daughter had a longer holiday break from college

[Lynn]

i wish my daughter had a longer holiday break from college

 

Granted-but she is spending it with Renaldo the Gardener (no wonder he has no time for me).

 

I wish that BBCA would show the current Christmas Dr. Who special at Christmastime this time around.

 

 

 

 

[ltljohn]

I wish that BBCA would show the current Christmas Dr. Who special at Christmastime this time around.

 

Granted, but because Renaldo left you for a co-ed you are too depressed to come out of you bedroom to watch it.

 

I wish it wasn't going to rain for Christmas.

[Mister Tee]

Granted, but it will rain ever day for the next 364 calendar days. Moss will grow in your armpits. Mushrooms will grow in your attic. Because there is nothing else to do, Cloris, Phyllis, Richard Simmons and Renaldo the gardener decide to become your permanent house guests (as well as BFish' daughter.) Lynn, who is spiteful of Renaldo, decides to become a stalker, and permanently camps outside your house in her newly aquired 1965 VW bus, blaring the Snoop Dogg/Too $hort Christmas mix at all hours of the night.

 

 

I wish I had a double Whopper with cheese and a large order of onion rings sitting in front of me right now.

[Matts_12GS]

I wish I had a double Whopper with cheese and a large order of onion rings sitting in front of me right now.

 

Granted, but because of the previous malice, your jaw is wired shut and ltljohn is making you watch him eat it....

 

I wish I could find that "next big thing" to sell and make a bazillion dollars.

[SageRider]

I wish I could find that "next big thing" to sell and make a bazillion dollars.

Granted. You get into the business of counterfeit money and make a bazillion dollars. Unfortunately the bills are exact duplicates of monopoly money and not only do you get arrested for trying to pass funny money, but you get sued for copyright infringement.

 

I wish Danny was here right now to shovel a bunch of snow...

[Albert]

I wish I could find that "next big thing" to sell and make a bazillion dollars.

Granted. You get into the business of counterfeit money and make a bazillion dollars. Unfortunately the bills are exact duplicates of monopoly money and not only do you get arrested for trying to pass funny money, but you get sued for copywrite infringement.

 

I wish Danny was here right now to shovel a bunch of snow...

 

Granted but Danny hasn't seen snow in so long he forgot how much he hated shoveling, he quits.

 

I wish Danny were here so he could freeze his petootie off with the rest of us.

[SageRider]

I wish I could find that "next big thing" to sell and make a bazillion dollars.

Granted. You get into the business of counterfeit money and make a bazillion dollars. Unfortunately the bills are exact duplicates of monopoly money and not only do you get arrested for trying to pass funny money, but you get sued for copywrite infringement.

 

I wish Danny was here right now to shovel a bunch of snow...

 

Granted but Danny hasn't seen snow in so long he forgot how much he hated shoveling, he quits.

 

I wish Danny were here so he could freeze his petootie off with the rest of us.

Granted, except Danny already lost his petootie in a shoveling accident.

 

I wish Danny was there with Albert anyway!!!

[BFish]

granted, but phyllis and cloris are holding both their petooties until the snow shoveling is finished.

 

i wish it was tomorrow cause i'm not working for almost 2 full days.

[Mister Tee]

Granted. It is tomorrow. In Siberia, where you have been reassigned, canceling your two day vacation.

 

 

I wish I would have grabbed the rest of the steak on home boy's plate before the waitress hauled it away.

[Huzband]

I wish I would have grabbed the rest of the steak on home boy's plate before the waitress hauled it away.

 

Granted, but it was laced with Salmonella, & you get to spend the next ten days in ICU.

 

I wish Micheal & Albert knew how to work their own *#^! snow shovel.

[ltljohn]

I wish Micheal & Albert knew how to work their own *#^! snow shovel.

 

Granted but Phyllis and Cloris still have your patootie.

 

I wish my driveway wasn't a sheet of ice.

[Matts_12GS]

I wish my driveway wasn't a sheet of ice.

 

Granted, now it's mostly frozen mud and your truck is buried to the axles in it.

 

I wish I could make myself drink cheap beer.

[ltljohn]

I wish my driveway wasn't a sheet of ice.

 

Granted, now it's mostly frozen mud and your truck is buried to the axles in it.

 

I wish I could make myself drink cheap beer.

 

Granted, all you drink now is Red White and Blue from the bottom shelf at Publix

 

I wish my truck wasn't buried in the mud

[Pennys Dad]

Granted, but now your truck is buried in snow and ice, again.

 

I wish my family and I could spend New Years eve hiking in Utah.

[Gary in Aus]

Wish granted you and your family are now hiking in Utah ,your trek will take you well past New Years eve and you will just keep wandering ,wandering,wandering.

 

Finally your search to find shelter from the driving sleet and cold leads to you the mouth of small cave , you crawl in on your hands and knees , then stop as you feel these small waxen pellets covered in brown coarse animal fur, there are hundreds of these littering the floor of the cave . You remove your mittens to allow your frozen cramped hands to clutch one of these plugs to your nose to smell but as it is so cold your sense of smell is gone so you press it to your lips to taste this unusual object.......I am glad I woke up from that dream just then ,

 

I wish I my beer would stay chilled as I sit on the sand today eating my lobsters

[BFish]

granted, but you're on the beach in norway eating north atlantic lobsta... the beer is cold tho.

 

i wish they still made movies like "white christmas"

 

 

[Mister Tee]

Granted, "White Christmas" is remade with Chris Rock, with music by the former Tupac. Santa decides that given the foul economy, he needs to put his transport capability to more profitable use - by smuggling Colombian cocaine to worldwide locations. The story ends in a fiery confrontation with the Norwegian military, after one of the elves rats Santa out.

 

 

 

I wish I were already eating that prime rib waiting to be cooked.

[Huzband]

I wish I were already eating that prime rib waiting to be cooked.

 

Granted, but since it hasn't been cooked yet, it's riddled with mad cow disease, & you're in ICU with ltljohn. Good news is, they let Phyllis, Cloris, Bea, & Richard Simmons in to visit.

 

I wish everyone would remember all that we have to be thankful for during this Christmas/Hanukkah season.

[ltljohn]

I wish I were already eating that prime rib waiting to be cooked.

 

Granted, but since it hasn't been cooked yet, it's riddled with mad cow disease, & you're in ICU with ltljohn. Good news is, they let Phyllis, Cloris, Bea, & Richard Simmons in to visit.

 

I wish everyone would remember all that we have to be thankful for during this Christmas/Hanukkah season.

 

Can't corrupt that one.

 

MERRY CHRISTMAS/HAPPY HANUKKAH EVERYONE!!!!!!

[Huzband]

I wish I were already eating that prime rib waiting to be cooked.

 

Granted, but since it hasn't been cooked yet, it's riddled with mad cow disease, & you're in ICU with ltljohn. Good news is, they let Phyllis, Cloris, Bea, & Richard Simmons in to visit.

 

I wish everyone would remember all that we have to be thankful for during this Christmas/Hanukkah season.

 

Can't corrupt that one.

 

MERRY CHRISTMAS/HAPPY HANUKKAH EVERYONE!!!!!!

 

Howz about we continue the corruption Dec. 26?

 

Don't corrupt mine, but start with a new one. Whadda ya say?

[Mister Tee]

Okay, here's a new one.

 

 

I wish 24 Hour Fitness was open Christmas morning. Just for me. Well, me and maybe a few hot exercise bunnies.

[ltljohn]

Okay, here's a new one.

 

 

I wish 24 Hour Fitness was open Christmas morning. Just for me. Well, me and maybe a few hot exercise bunnies.

 

Granted but your exercise bunnies are Cloris, Phyllis and Bea and Richard Simmons.

[BFish]

...and they are ALL wearing thongs

[BFish]

I wish I were already eating that prime rib waiting to be cooked.

 

Granted, but since it hasn't been cooked yet, it's riddled with mad cow disease, & you're in ICU with ltljohn. Good news is, they let Phyllis, Cloris, Bea, & Richard Simmons in to visit.

 

I wish everyone would remember all that we have to be thankful for during this Christmas/Hanukkah season.

 

Can't corrupt that one.

 

MERRY CHRISTMAS/HAPPY HANUKKAH EVERYONE!!!!!!

 

Howz about we continue the corruption Dec. 26?

 

Don't corrupt mine, but start with a new one. Whadda ya say?

 

 

 

 

 

ok

[Matts_12GS]

Don't corrupt mine, but start with a new one. Whadda ya say?

 

 

 

ok

 

Don't corrupt me bro!

[BFish]

that's a misquote! reread the posts.

[Matts_12GS]

I wish I were already eating that prime rib waiting to be cooked.

 

Granted, but since it hasn't been cooked yet, it's riddled with mad cow disease, & you're in ICU with ltljohn. Good news is, they let Phyllis, Cloris, Bea, & Richard Simmons in to visit.

 

I wish everyone would remember all that we have to be thankful for during this Christmas/Hanukkah season.

 

Can't corrupt that one.

 

MERRY CHRISTMAS/HAPPY HANUKKAH EVERYONE!!!!!!

 

Howz about we continue the corruption Dec. 26?

 

Don't corrupt mine, but start with a new one. Whadda ya say?

 

 

 

 

 

ok

 

Granted.

 

I wish I was motivated to go out and learn to ride a dirt bike.

[SageRider]

I wish I was motivated to go out and learn to ride a dirt bike.

Granted. However, the new administration's environmental policies make it illegal to take any vehicle off pavement....

 

 

I wish it was still Christmas...

[Mister Tee]

Granted, but you're now a grinch.

 

 

I wish it was warm enough to ride down to the coast today. 29 degrees and a 200 mile round trip doesn't go over well for me.

[ltljohn]

 

 

I wish it was still Christmas...

 

Granted, but the only gift you get is the Richard Simmons poster for your garage.

 

I wish it was a bit warmer without ice patches and sand all over the roads so I could ride today.