rogera Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 granted ,but Goober came with it and is your chief mechanic. Cloris is the bookkeeper and pumps gas in a thong. wish the gator/sooner football game was this weekend. Granted but you dont find out until your eating BBQ with the rest of us on Saturday The game will be over by the time you get home. I wish It was tomorrow. I'm hungry. Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 2, 2009 Author Share Posted January 2, 2009 Granted. It's tomorrow. But you missed lunch and dinner, so now you're really hungry. I wish it were BBQ weather outside right now. Link to comment
tallman Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Granted. But apparently you lost the recipe. I wish the world 24 hours of peace. Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 2, 2009 Author Share Posted January 2, 2009 Granted, but in the process you transformed the nature of man into an incoherent babbling species with no intelligence or drive, and now we have no feed in to the Social Security system anymore so we will be forced to prostitute ourselves to well endowed zoo animals in order to survive. I wish Burger King would bring the $.99 Whopper back. That was a killer deal when it lasted. Link to comment
Matts_12GS Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I wish Burger King would bring the $.99 Whopper back. That was a killer deal when it lasted. Granted. That killer deal has left so much cholesterol and plaque in your arteries that the mortician cannot straighten your limbs from the massive coronary you suffered while riding home with your $.99 heart attack. I wish it wasn't going to be so cold in Boston next week while I'm there. Link to comment
BFish Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Granted, but in the process you transformed the nature of man into an incoherent babbling species with no intelligence or drive, and now we have no feed in to the Social Security system anymore so we will be forced to prostitute ourselves to well endowed zoo animals in order to survive. I wish Burger King would bring the $.99 Whopper back. That was a killer deal when it lasted. granted, but it's a supply and demand thang so to make up for the infrastructure tax requirements highway/road tax is added to each $.99 whopper bringing the total cost to $6.89. i wish a loaded double whopper with cheese had negative calories, no fat, zero cholestoral and all the fiber needed for a week. Link to comment
tallman Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I wish Burger King would bring the $.99 Whopper back. That was a killer deal when it lasted. Granted. That killer deal has left so much cholesterol and plaque in your arteries that the mortician cannot straighten your limbs from the massive coronary you suffered while riding home with your $.99 heart attack. I wish it wasn't going to be so cold in Boston next week while I'm there. Sorry Brian, he's first. Granted, it won't be so cold. It will be colder than it ever has been before and all th eplanes will be grounded, highways closed, and you'll have to walk back to Jax. I wish I could heal with a touch. Link to comment
SageRider Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I wish I could heal with a touch Granted. You are now a dog and heel at a touch from your master. Being a dog, you also do not realize how the spelling of your wish was corrupted. I wish cats didn't shed (take 2!). Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 2, 2009 Author Share Posted January 2, 2009 Granted, cat's don't shed. Now they pee on everything like a dog, especially your house furniture. I wish I owned the City of New York. Link to comment
REVz Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I wish I owned the City of New York. I grant your wish for the corrupt and now hereby corrupt your wish....You own New York City and are thereby obligated to go door-to-door to collect all the taxes invoked by the previous administration. I wish I could buy a new motorcycle at the Motorcycle show on Saturday... Link to comment
ltljohn Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 I wish I could buy a new motorcycle at the Motorcycle show on Saturday... Granted, but the bike you buy is a '57 Vespa with an exhaust leak. I wish that fish didn't taste like fish so I would eat more. Link to comment
VinnyR11 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 I wish that fish didn't taste like fish so I would eat more. Granted. Fish now tastes like your favorite Haagen-Dazs, but you wind up eating so much that you gain 30 pounds and are hospitalized from mercury poisoning. I wish dogs were totally self sufficient so we could get one and still travel anywhere we want without having to leave it in a kennel. Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 3, 2009 Author Share Posted January 3, 2009 Granted, but now they are useless for hunting birds, herding cattle and chasing bad guys away from your house. I wish it were warmer than 36 degrees outside so I can have a comfortable ride to the coast today. Link to comment
Paul Mihalka Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 Granted, but now they are useless for hunting birds, herding cattle and chasing bad guys away from your house. I wish it were warmer than 36 degrees outside so I can have a comfortable ride to the coast today. Granted, you have a nice comfortable ride at 70 degrees to the coast, but on the way back a thunderstorm hits you with 50 mph winds and hail. I wish Mister Tee had nice electric riding gear so he can have a nice comfortable ride to the coast without complaining about the weather Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 4, 2009 Author Share Posted January 4, 2009 Granted, Mister Tee had nice electric riding gear. Unfortunately, he doesn't have it anymore since the thunderstorm fried out the electronics and electrocuted the Tee on his last ride, so he will still continue to bitch and moan about the cold weather and take his animosity out by corrupting peoples' wishes. I wish my women would respond to my messages sooner. It's a sunny day outside and I need to make plans ASAP. Link to comment
SageRider Posted January 4, 2009 Share Posted January 4, 2009 I wish my women would respond to my messages sooner. It's a sunny day outside and I need to make plans ASAP. Granted. Women now respond to your messages as soon as received. Unfortunately, your delivery service of sea turtles and desert tortoises is not very reliable. The first message has yet to be delivered, and that one was sent on your behalf at birth.... I wish the Chargers would win the rest of their games this year. Link to comment
Huzband Posted January 4, 2009 Share Posted January 4, 2009 I wish the Chargers would win the rest of their games this year. Granted, but they're games of chance, so they get suspended from the playoffs. I wish the Bama players hadn't been so cocky & arrogant. Link to comment
tallman Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Granted. But then they would have been Gators. I wish basketball season was shorter, and football season was longer. Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 5, 2009 Author Share Posted January 5, 2009 Granted, but you are now a Raiders fan, and you become deranged and move to Oakland. After another horrific season, angry locals burn down your apartment block and you walk the ghetto streets in destitution. I wish Nascar would run all year long. Link to comment
StuGotz Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I wish Nascar would run all year long. I'm sorry, 10 months outta the year is enough...wish not granted. MB> Link to comment
VinnyR11 Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I wish Nascar would run all year long. Granted, but it's run as the "NASCAR 365" at MIS. Fans are bored to tears after day 2, and the entire months of July and October are run under full course yellows. I wish I could ski like the extreme skiers I see in modern ski movies. Link to comment
tallman Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Granted. But, Algorey is right, all the snow melts and you have to lash your skis together to make a raft. I wish I won a lottery big enough to buy BMW Motorrad. Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 5, 2009 Author Share Posted January 5, 2009 Granted, but you pay more in taxes than you take in lottery earnings, and you have to resort to a life of crime, drugs and prostitution in order to survive. I wish I was on vacation right now. Link to comment
ltljohn Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I wish I was on vacation right now. Granted but it's at a nudist resort with Cloris, Phyllis and Richard S. I wish it would stay above 40f for a couple of days. Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 5, 2009 Author Share Posted January 5, 2009 Granted, but it causes an early snow melt, and with the lack of rain needed to wash away the phlegm and mucus off the sidewalks, a giant cholera epidemic breaks out, and they run out of antibiotics before you get to the clinic. I wish it was Miller time right now. Link to comment
SageRider Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 wish it was Miller time right now. Granted. Unfortunately, even though you imbibe all of the mucus and phlegm off the sidewalk as extra flavoring to your "Miller", you are still the first victim of the Cholera outbreak. I wish I wished the only uncorruptible wish! Link to comment
ltljohn Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 I wish I wished the only uncorruptible wish! Granted, but now because you have usurped Danny's wish he has given Cloris, Richard and Phyllis your address and told them strange things about you. I wish I could get my 4yr old to bed easier at night Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 6, 2009 Author Share Posted January 6, 2009 Granted, but when Child Protective Services discovers you've been giving him shots of Jack Daniels every night to put him to sleep, they throw you in jail and impound your motorcycle. At the impound lot, some attendant decides to take it for a joyride, and ends up crashing in to a barrier. The family's product defect attorney discovers that an owner modification was responsible for the bike crash, and they get a huge civil judgment against you, and liquidate your estate to pay for it. I wish I hadn't drank so much beer and scotch last night. Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 12, 2009 Author Share Posted January 12, 2009 Okay I'm recovered from my hangover now. I wish BMW would build a more maintenance friendly RT. Link to comment
VinnyR11 Posted January 12, 2009 Share Posted January 12, 2009 I wish BMW would build a more maintenance friendly RT. Granted. You ordered your new Beemer with the newly available bodywork delete option. I wish the Giants didn't blow it against Philly. Link to comment
ltljohn Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wish the Giants didn't blow it against Philly. Granted, they blew it against the Detroit and are the laughing stock of the NFC. I wish the tupperware on my RT could be removed by flipping a switch. Link to comment
SageRider Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wish the tupperware on my RT could be removed by flipping a switch. Granted. At the flip of a switch, the slave master orders you to remove the tupperware. You try to ignore the stinging cut on your back and knuckle down to work.... I wish I could think of another decent wish... Link to comment
Matts_12GS Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wish I could think of another decent wish... Granted, you wish you could buy me a drink, in fact several drinks this weekend at the IMS show in NYC. Graciously, I'll let you. I wish I had another beer closer so I don't to go walk across my palatial mcmansion for another Link to comment
ltljohn Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wish I had another beer closer so I don't to go walk across my palatial mcmansion for another Granted, you now live in an outhouse and your next beer is below you just reach down. I wish it was Friday already. Link to comment
Matts_12GS Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wish I had another beer closer so I don't to go walk across my palatial mcmansion for another Granted, you now live in an outhouse and your next beer is below you just reach down. I wish it was Friday already. Granted, as I reach down and buy you a warm "corona." I wish I could get over this sinus infection. Good beer shouldn't smell like rotted meat! Link to comment
ltljohn Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wish I could get over this sinus infection. Good beer shouldn't smell like rotted meat! Granted, but because of where you live all beer smells like rotted meat. I wish I knew the meaning of life. Link to comment
Matts_12GS Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wish I knew the meaning of life. Granted. 42 I wish I knew the ultimate question, to life, the universe and everything! Link to comment
ltljohn Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wish I knew the ultimate question, to life, the universe and everything! Granted, but the beer you drank killed the brain cells that held that information. I wish I could watch Top Gear more often. Link to comment
Matts_12GS Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wish I knew the ultimate question, to life, the universe and everything! Granted, but the beer you drank killed the brain cells that held that information. I wish I could watch Top Gear more often. Granted. You become so obsessed with watching other people have fun in expensive European vehicles that you become an internet junkie moto snob... Oh wait, someone beat me to that! I wish I had a lime so I could make a mojito Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 14, 2009 Author Share Posted January 14, 2009 Granted, but you quit drinking, now you have no use for a mojito so you throw the lime away. And acquire a bad case of scurvy as a result. I wish that my "Corrupt a Wish" foundation would take off financially and make me millions of dollars. Link to comment
Silver Surfer/AKAButters Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 It does, however, you squander the millions seeking pleasures of the flesh and pusuing high risk investment strategies. You wind up penniless and homeless. I wish that I could get to 90 kilos. Link to comment
Matts_12GS Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 Granted, you got to 90 kilos, unfortunately it was 90 kilos that the FBI planted as a honey pot. Due to mandatory sentancing guidelines you are now locked away until you die at which time you will be reanimated and incarcerated until you die again. I wish more people paid attention when they drive. Link to comment
BFish Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 Granted, you got to 90 kilos, unfortunately it was 90 kilos that the FBI planted as a honey pot. Due to mandatory sentancing guidelines you are now locked away until you die at which time you will be reanimated and incarcerated until you die again. I wish more people paid attention when they drive. granted, but if everyone paid attention when they drove he'd/she'd become the wealthiest sob on the face of the earth, buy out the middle east, raise the price of oil and none of us could afford to pay attention any more. i wish the toilet paper in public restrooms was at least 75% as soft/good as charmin. Link to comment
Silver Surfer/AKAButters Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 You use public restrooms? Link to comment
BFish Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 You use public restrooms? had to at the movies the other night. (also listen to NPR) Link to comment
Matts_12GS Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 granted, but if everyone paid attention when they drove he'd/she'd become the wealthiest sob on the face of the earth, buy out the middle east, raise the price of oil and none of us could afford to pay attention any more. i wish the toilet paper in public restrooms was at 75% as soft/good as charmin. Granted, paper is now so soft and pliable you no longer have to go the Doctor for "that" part of your physical. As a result you beg for more "John Wayne" paper to end the humiliation. I wish the KTM was here. Link to comment
ltljohn Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 I wish the KTM was here. Granted, the Killer Tomato Monsters haunt your sleep every night and you are too tired to ride the orange motorcycle. I wish it was going to be warmer in NYC for the bike show Friday. Link to comment
VinnyR11 Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 I wish it was going to be warmer in NYC for the bike show Friday. Granted. Instead of 6 degrees, it's going to be 7. I wish I could keep everything the same about my bike, except get the extra torque and HP of an R12. Link to comment
ltljohn Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 I wish I could keep everything the same about my bike, except get the extra torque and HP of an R12. Granted, the extra HP and torque shred your trans and final drive leaving you stranded in the middle of Kansas and the only farm around belongs to Phyllis, Cloris and Richard S you are forced to spend a week. I wish it was tomorrow already. Link to comment
Mister Tee Posted January 16, 2009 Author Share Posted January 16, 2009 It is tomorrow already. But you just wasted 22 hours whittling your life away with nothing accomplished, and you sink in to a deep depression, and become a drug addict and an alcoholic. Due to budget cuts, the State of Pennsylvania sends you to a church run leper colony North of Greenland after you acquire an incurable, infectious disease from a needle passed on by the Tibetian prostitute you've been sharing a cardboard tent with. I wish I didn't have to waste such a nice day inside a stuffy office. Link to comment
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