Out of the mouths of babes...

[Gregori]

What have YOUR kids (or grandkids) said that you found amusing/insightful/etc.

(Actual, personal, experiences - not humor that you've read somewhere.)

 

My incident, that started me thinking about it:

Recently, we were out doing a family thing, traveling in the truck with my 3 yr old in the back seat. We're cruising along at a leisurely pace on a back road looking at scenery, and the boy pipes up from the back seat: "Go faster - go faster."

I reply, "I'm sorry, we can't do that right now."

Amazingly, he seems to accept that answer, and settles down.

 

Maybe ten or so minutes down the road, a police car goes by in the other direction, and my son waves at it -"Hi, Police Car!"

His head swivels around and he watches it disappear over the rise. The INSTANT it's out of sight he pops back around and says - "Okay! NOW we can go faster, Papa!"

(My wife gave me a wry look and says, "I guess its genetic.")

 

 

[Les is more]

It's the stuff they come up with that has no earthly origin that you can figure out that always gets me.

 

27 years ago, when he was three, my oldest, Evan, had a couple that still crack me up.

 

Driving to the cool, misty coast from our 10 degree warmer inland home, we had the windows rolled down. From the car seat in back we hear,

 

"Roll up that window!" "I'm freezin' like a dead dolphin on the shore!"

 

Also threeish, looking down at his baby brother Damon one day-

 

"Look at those curls." "I think I'll call him 'Romelle'."

[BeniciaRT_GT]

Niece put me in my place one day a few years back:

 

I was working on something and had to be on a knee to reach. As I got up, I guess I let out the standard under your breath grunt.

 

While she was watching whatever it was I was doing, she looks me straight in the eye and says, "Man, Uncle Richard, you make "old people noises."

 

Really felt the love...

[bakerzdosen]

The other day, our 7 year old proclaimed (while imitating a chicken) that he would be better at picking up food than real chickens.

 

"Why?" we asked?

 

"Because I have a really big pecker."

[russell_bynum]

The other day, our 7 year old proclaimed (while imitating a chicken) that he would be better at picking up food than real chickens.

 

"Why?" we asked?

 

"Because I have a really big pecker."

 

Somewhere in California's Central Valley, Wurty just blew Dr. Pepper out of his nose and all over his computer screen.

[BeniciaRT_GT]

The other day, our 7 year old proclaimed (while imitating a chicken) that he would be better at picking up food than real chickens.

 

"Why?" we asked?

 

"Because I have a really big pecker."

 

Somewhere in California's Central Valley, Wurty just blew Dr. Pepper out of his nose and all over his computer screen.

 

And his heart is all fuzzy and warm... I know that will make him proud!

 

By the way, there is coffee all over my laptop now!!!

[SeanC]

A couple months ago my mother-in-law took Finn (who recently turned 3) for the day. When she dropped him off later that day, she asked me what "dewbag" meant. Apparently he uttered the term more than once whilst strapped into his carseat. I told her I didn't know, that he makes up random words all the time.

 

"I don't think it was random," she said. "Every time we waited at a light, he'd point to a car and say 'Look, Mimi, a dewbag.' I had no idea what he was trying to say, and he didn't explain it other than to keep pointing them out."

 

It then dawned on me... he was referring to other drivers as douche bags. Prolly picked it up from his mom...

[Tony_K]

 

That my friend is PRECIOUS

 

 

[russell_bynum]

A couple months ago my mother-in-law took Finn (who recently turned 3) for the day. When she dropped him off later that day, she asked me what "dewbag" meant. Apparently he uttered the term more than once whilst strapped into his carseat. I told her I didn't know, that he makes up random words all the time.

 

"I don't think it was random," she said. "Every time we waited at a light, he'd point to a car and say 'Look, Mimi, a dewbag.' I had no idea what he was trying to say, and he didn't explain it other than to keep pointing them out."

 

It then dawned on me... he was referring to other drivers as douche bags. Prolly picked it up from his mom...

 

Our niece used to refer to other cars as "idiots". i.e. "Look at that blue idiot over there."

 

Along the same lines...back in the days just after the earth cooled, we were out in a field somewhere picking some sort of berry. Apparently, the bushes had thorns and every now and then, my Dad would impale himself and mumble "damnit". When I ran out of berries, I asked "Dad, can I have some more danits?"

[Les is more]

I was riding in a friend's car and her little child was in back. The little girl started crying--loudly--that something was tangled around her toe. Mama said, "Which toe?" After a bit of a pause came the answer. "The one that got roast beef."

[russell_bynum]

I was riding in a friend's car and her little child was in back. The little girl started crying--loudly--that something was tangled around her toe. Mama said, "Which toe?" After a bit of a pause came the answer. "The one that got roast beef."

 

LOL!

[eddd]

While I have none of my own, 32 years in education has brought me in contact with thousands of kids. The one that sticks in my mind was from early in my career...

 

A second grade boy was cussing. I pulled him aside and asked, "Does your mother talk like that?"

 

With only a slight pause he replied, "Yes, when she's mad at my father."

 

I took a longer pause before I replied, "Well, we don't talk like that at school."