Jump to content
IGNORED

Mom and Solzjenitsyn

Francois_Dumas

By Francois_Dumas
in Riders Discuss Other Topics

Recommended Posts

Francois_Dumas

Francois_Dumas

Posted
Posted

In fact, some people may have never heard of either. You can look up one on Wikepedia..... the other on my Blog :/

 

Nope, they never met. But there are similarities.

 

They both were extremely important. One for the Russian population, history and indeed, the 'free world'.

The other for my Dad, my brother and me personally.

 

Neither of them were 'riders', but I figure they qualify for this board as 'Other Topics'.

 

They both were born at almost the same time, and lived to be 89 years old.

 

They both died almost at the same time too. Mom died last night at 23:30.

 

Guess who I think was more important !?

 

Yes, Mom died last night in the nursing home. Nina and I, Vivian and Menno were with her. She never regained consciousness after she fell asleep on Saturday night. The medical staff saw to it she had no pain and was laying there peacefully.

 

It was not nice..... for us. If you can, avoid being around dying people. Having said that, please make sure you are there for your loved ones if you can, even if they can't hear, see or feel you anymore...... or so you think!

 

 

This morning I arranged the funeral, for Friday. I also have a major migraine.... I guess at least this time I have a good reason for one.

We are at peace with the fact that Mom's gone. We saw her every day for the past 4 months, except for the 4 days we drove to France..... and back.

Dad was with her for 6 hours every day, keeping her company.

We have said things to each other, laughed together, and cried some. We have helped each other, she leafed through our book many times, enjoyed the paintings we hang on the hospital wall for her, and the plants we put on the table.

 

Mom would not have gotten better, the cancer took car e of that, thank you very much. So it is good she is gone now and will be spared for any pain and further hardship. The operation she had and the stay in hospital was bad enough.

 

 

When this is all 'wrapped up' maybe we can go back to the mountains for a few weeks..... and ride..... before we focus on our next 'issue': Dad.

 

You'll excuse me for not having been around much, or being around much over the next days and weeks.. we've got things to catch up, things to do, and some crying to do on some mountain top or other.

 

Nina and I would like to thank all of you good friends for all the good wishes, good karma, wonderful prayers and kind e-mails and messages. They have helped us a lot, and continue to be a wonderful support.

 

Hoping to bring you some 'Real Ride Tales' again soon.....

 

Nina and Francois

Link to comment
Hermes

Hermes

Posted
Posted

Francoise,

 

Condolences to you and your family.

 

It has become clear to this board just how close to your Mom you and your family were, and we share your grieve, for we all have to say farewell one day to the one that gave us life.

 

...and Thank You for sharing.

 

Link to comment
tallman

tallman

Posted
Posted

Francois,

Beth and I are sorry to hear of your loss.

I'm glad your mom got to share the book with you.

Condolences to Nina and the rest of the family.

Our thoughts and prayers go out to all of you.

Link to comment
Les is more

Les is more

Posted
Posted

To be lovingly released from the arms of those you hold dear--you all have given your mom and yourselves a precious gift.

 

I wish you peace, deep in your hearts.

Link to comment
blkvelvt

blkvelvt

Posted
Posted

I had a similiar situation with my father when he passed away. My thoughts were two sided. It's the last thing on earth you want to happen and there's no where else on earth you want to be at that time. I got to tell my father "It's OK, his kids will be fine." My father was at piece with his family there. I'm sure your mother felt the same way.She was very fortunate to have you there. Your familys loss is in our thoughts and prayers. Godspeed.

Link to comment
Bob Palin

Bob Palin

Posted
Posted

Sorry to hear your news Francois, no matter how much death is a release for the sick it is hard on those left behind.

 

As for being around dying people, in time you will be glad you were able to be with your mother at the end. I was with my father when he died and while it was horrible then I now feel, not happy, but somehow satisfied or content that I got to see him at the last.

Link to comment
TyTass

TyTass

Posted
Posted

Francois, you have my most profound sympathies. I wish you speed to the time when the pain of separation is dulled, when you and yours will find solace in memories of love and family.

Link to comment
Firefight911

Firefight911

Posted
Posted

Francois,

 

You are the mirror to your mother and it shines brightly.

 

Please accept Jamie's and my sincerest condolences for your loss. Thank you for thinking of us as we think of you and your family.

Link to comment
Paul_Burkett

Paul_Burkett

Posted
Posted

Francois and Nina, I am sad and yet relieved at the passing of your mother. The pain that she felt is over and the heart wrenching you have gone through is soon to subside, but the loss is still there. Our prayers for you and your family will continue and as always, we are here for you.

Link to comment
Joel

Joel

Posted
Posted

My sympathies, Francois. May the peace that Leslie and others have wished for you and your family find you soon.

 

You've now done some of the hardest things you'll ever do in life. Eventually, great strength will come from that.

Link to comment
stubble!

stubble!

Posted
Posted

Francois and Nina,

 

I'll be thinking of you and your family on that mountain top. You've honored your mother with your love and care. Peace to you both, and to your Dad.

 

Sebastian

 

Link to comment
Matts_12GS

Matts_12GS

Posted
Posted

Be strong Francois, for your dad and for the rest of the family as needed. When the time comes for you not to be strong, let the others, including this community be there for you.

 

I wish you peace in these difficult times.

Link to comment
hANNAbONE

hANNAbONE

Posted
Posted

sO sORRY to hear this - please know that I'll hold your mother and the family intentions in my daily Mass prayer. All good things to you & Nina.

Link to comment
DaveTheAffable

DaveTheAffable

Posted
Posted

Prayers for her, for you, and all close to you.

 

What a testimony that you honored her not only when you were with her, but when you weren't. Sharing her and your struggles with us? Well I for one was honored...

Link to comment
Wheels Rollin'

Wheels Rollin'

Posted
Posted

Heartfelt condolences for the loss of your Mother, Francois -- to you and all in your family... May her presence in your memory always remain as powerful and everlasting as it is at this moment...

 

~ Bill

Link to comment
Rinkydink

Rinkydink

Posted
Posted

Francois, I was there when my mother died and it was one of the toughest days of my life. It of course was also a blessing because the suffering ended. God bless you and your family.

Link to comment
Shaman97

Shaman97

Posted
Posted

Francois,

 

Our condolences to you and your family.

It appears you have the proper perspective at this difficult time. We wish you well.

 

Bob & Jackie

Link to comment
TEWKS

TEWKS

Posted
Posted

No matter how long they live, it will never be long enough. Her passing will however get easier with time.

 

 

 

Pat

Link to comment
Couchrocket

Couchrocket

Posted
Posted
Sorry to hear your news Francois, no matter how much death is a release for the sick it is hard on those left behind.

 

As for being around dying people, in time you will be glad you were able to be with your mother at the end. I was with my father when he died and while it was horrible then I now feel, not happy, but somehow satisfied or content that I got to see him at the last.

 

Well said, Bob. There is something peace inducing about knowing that we've done all we can do to "be there" for our parents -- regardless of circumstances, or relationship quality. At the risk of waxing "religious," the truth of "honoring one's mother and father" bringing a blessing -- is true.

 

Francois, my heart and prayers go out to you at this time of loss, stress, duty, pain. As Bob well says, a time will come when you'll be content that you were there, in all the ways you were, to the very end.

Link to comment
Francois_Dumas

Francois_Dumas

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Many thanks for all your kind messages and thought.... highly appreciated !

I fell ill these past days... no, not because of Mom.... but managed to make all the arrangements for tomorrow anyhow. I have even written a speech.... of sorts.

 

After tomorrow we have our next 'project' : Dad ! (and how to ascertain he is well cared for 'in spite of' his own ideas about that ;-) ).

Link to comment
BeniciaRT_GT

BeniciaRT_GT

Posted
Posted

Francois and Nina,

 

I can't express in this forum how very sorry I am for your loss.

 

The only offset is how wonderful it was that you got to spend all that time with her and she got to see her book!!!

 

I'm sure you and your Dad will work out a great situation to take care of him while allowing him his independence.

 

As a personal note, I was somewhat lucky that I got to say goodbye to my Mom. although I've been out of the house since I was 15, I always had the opportunity to visit often.

 

She was in the hospital and I flew back to Ga. to stay with her a week. She was getting better and I was out of vacation time so I flew back to Ca. As soon as I got home I got the news that she had gotten much worse, and I got back on a plane. That was the longest 9 hours I can remember. She had promised me she'd talk to me when I got back, and true to her word, when I walked in the room, Dad asked if she knew who was there. She said, "Yep, my favorite son." (A running joke between us, as I always told her I was her favorite, and while agreeing she always reminded me that I was her Only son.) Although those were her last words, we all felt some comfort that she was surrounded by her whole family, and knew it.

 

I know how hard it is to be there for the moment, but I really feel blessed that I was there for both of them when they passed.

 

I hope that isn't too much of a hijack to say how much I know it meant to her to know you all were there and confirm how very much she meant to everyone. I hope that provides Y'all with as much comfort as I'm sure she felt.

 

Also, I was lucky enough to be able to both write and deliver my dad's eulogy, so I have faith you can do it!!!

 

Again, I'm so sorry for your loss, and Jacqueline and I will keep you at the forefront of our warmest wishes and hope for a quick healing process.

 

I guess I'll let you slide now for not attending my Tech Daze, this time!!!!

 

Best wishes!!!

 

 

Link to comment
algover

algover

Posted
Posted

Our heartfelt condolences, Francois. Words often fail me, and this time is no different. But know that you are in our thoughts.

 

Peter and Jane

Link to comment
Francois_Dumas

Francois_Dumas

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Thanks Peter, thoughts matter !

 

Richard, Jacqueline, thank you.

Last time we'll see her today..... and we're all together.

 

No hijack... I'll keep a rain check on that Tech Daze of yours :wave:

 

Warmest regards,

Francois and Nina

Link to comment

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...