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How do you feel about posting personal info?


Joe Frickin' Friday

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Joe Frickin' Friday
Posted

This discussion board has over 15,000 members comprising a wide range of personalities and sensitibilities. In terms of openness, we run the range: at one end of the spectrum there are the lurkers who post nothing, and and all the way at the other end of the spectrum are the unguarded hearts who share very personal experiences and feelings, including the loss of family members and pets, births of children, marriages, divorces, graduations, and major illnesses.

 

It's interesting to note that these very personal discussions are carried out in a very public place. A simple analogy would be that of a discussion taking place in a crowded bar/nightclub, where people all around your group can hear what you are saying.

 

Not only that, but as the archive of bmwr1100rt.com shows, you can reasonably expect that these discussions will persist in some corner of cyberspace for many years to come. A slightly more complex analogy would be a discussion in a crowded bar/nightclub where the people around you, friends and strangers alike, are writing down the things you say.

 

I've seen news pieces about colleges trying to discourage students from posting videos/stories of their drunken antics or sexual escapades, warning them that such things can come back to bite them in the future when they start looking for a job. Similarly, here on BMWST, one can regularly read (and see photos) of extralegal riding activities. While material so posted can't readily be used as evidence in a legal proceeding, it's conceivable that it could unexpectedly compromise one's reputation at a future date.

 

How do you feel about sharing such personal info here on BMWST? When you share stories of personal triumphs/tragedies/peccadillos for your friends to read, how do you feel about the fact that complete strangers are reading it too? How about the fact that what you've written is likely to endure for a long time?

Posted

To me it is a small historical record of my short time on the big blue marble. If someone wants to try and use the fact that my GPS said my max speed was 124mph based on a ride tale, then let them try. I am at an age now, where if that is all they can dig up on me, then I did a pretty good job covering my tracks. :)

 

 

Posted

 

 

I don't want my tracks to be covered......I'm a leader!!!!!

 

:grin:

 

 

 

Posted

I am a very public person anyway, so this is just one more venue. Especially if I'm not making sh1t up and don't have to keep track of the stories. :/

Posted

I do have to admit that I am surprised to see so many public discussions of very personal matters such as relationship or marital problems, illnesses, deaths of loved ones, etc. Not something I would ever be inclined to do but everyone is different I guess... if it provides some comfort why not.

 

Unless I ever planned on running for public office of course, in which case I wouldn't even have an Internet connection.

Firefight911
Posted

I'm with Tom on this one. If this sharing makes the big blue marble smaller, it means I have the ability to reach out and be enriched much more than if I had not shared. What I have received in return for reaching out far and away exceeds anything I've ever posted.

bakerzdosen
Posted

None of your business...

 

:/

 

 

 

 

(I do self-censor knowing whatever I post will be around forever, but for the most part I'm in Tom's camp as well.)

Posted

Self disclosure is a good thing..It demonstrates and builds confidence, humility, self worth and validates one's feelings. It makes us all more human and contributes greatly to comaraderie. It makes the world a little smaller and can promote compassion and understanding. It's good for the soul and if I disclose something that someone chooses to later use against me it's that person that ultimately loses.. It promotes respect and honesty..It makes me a better person.. And most important of all it makes Whip a better leader! :thumbsup:

Posted

 

I don't want my tracks to be covered......I'm a leader!!!!!

 

:grin:

 

You leave so many tracks Whip, I need hip boots just to follow you. :dopeslap::wave:

Firefight911
Posted
And most important of all it makes Whip a better leader! :thumbsup:

 

And we all know how he leads, huh Billy!?

 

283938690_Dv35Q-M.jpg

 

Oh, silly me. That was YOU they were after you scofflaw!

 

Yep!

 

283938986_M5oDb-M.jpg

Posted

I often wondered about just what Mitch brings up, how much is too much?

 

I like this forum for just this fact, the people are real here and there is honest communication and support. It is a community of sincere and generous people, a nice oasis in the cyber-jungle.

 

I am not at all sure that the cops aren't going to be waiting out on one of the fast roady by Torrey for y'all one of these days, tho'.

 

 

Posted

Google yourselves... Your discussions here show up!

So if you are violating your life insurance policy, the terms of your lease, cheating on your taxes, or otherwise misbehaving, any bragging about it you do here is certain to bite you in the arse someday...

Mister Tee
Posted

This is a topic that has been discussed before a couple times.

 

My own personal take on it is that I do not want to share any personal information on myself, and my whereabouts publicly on the Internet (or any other public media.) Public anonymity is technically a job requirement for me, and there are people out there that I don't want knowing what I'm up to.

 

But that's not an absolute requirement. I'm not in any way worried about either law enforcement and/or some government agency reading my posts or knowing who I am since I would never discuss classified matters, or purport any criminal activity, even anonymously. For that matter I don't care if the administrators of this site or even some of the members know who I am in real life. What I don't want is for someone who I might know to be able to plug my real name in to Google and find out my life history and whereabouts.

 

I happen to moderate on three other sportbike sites, two of them as the Tee. So, obviously I see value in Internet message boards, both as a participant and as a leader, and I choose to strike a balance between personal exposure (which quite frankly is pretty minimal) and anonymity.

Francois_Dumas
Posted

If I'd give a tosh I wouldn't be posting here... as well as in a gazillion other places :/

 

 

Joe Frickin' Friday
Posted
I'm not in any way worried about either law enforcement and/or some government agency reading my posts or knowing who I am since I would never discuss classified matters, or purport any criminal activity, even anonymously.

 

The idea of legal consequences and/or blackmail is actually only a very small part of what prompted me to start this thread. Primarily I was interested in what motivates people to post (or not post) things that they generally would not share with the stranger in line behind them at the grocery store.

 

My own Torrey ride tale from a year ago comes to mind. A great many personal moments were described in detail, laid out for friends, family and strangers alike to peruse. Looking back, I remember that I really wanted to tell that story, and I have no regrets at all after the fact, but I still can't quite put my finger on why I wanted to do it. The reason I gave at the time was that I just wanted to create a detailed account for a time in the future when the memories start to fade - but of course if that were it, then I wouldn't have felt the need to post it here; I would have written it and then just parked it on my hard drive...

Posted

I don't care about revealing personal stuff, obviously I'm not going to publish my SS# or credit card numbers but my stories, feelings and opinions etc can only make the world a better place :/ I would tell a perfect stranger all these things, it's just that they wouldn't listen, by posting on the net I can at least pretend that somebody is. Way back at the start of all this interweb stuff, in the first newsgroups, when there were so few people online it seemed incomprehensible that it would matter, I revealed things that could sully my reputation. They are still around but haven't hurt me in the 25 years since. And no, I'm not going to do it again here.

Joe Frickin' Friday
Posted
And no, I'm not going to do it again here.

 

You don't need to; other people will do it for you.

 

BobPalininCody_005.jpg

Dave McReynolds
Posted

In my professional life as a CPA, I have to be very careful not to disclose any unauthorized information. It's pretty automatic that I would never talk to someone about some other person's business or taxes. Sometimes, it can get dicey, as when clients for whom I have done tax returns for years get divorced or have an acrimonious business split-up. Then I'm in a position where I can't talk as freely with either party about things that I might have freely discussed before.

 

My personal life, on the other hand, is pretty much an open book. Maybe it's a reaction to the caution I have to practice in my professional life. But I just don't care who knows what about my past successes or failures, or my hopes, dreams, and aspirations for the future.

Posted
And no, I'm not going to do it again here.

You don't need to; other people will do it for you.

Whoever it was that said all publicity is good publicity clearly didn't have their picture taken doing their Al Bundy impression!
Posted
I was interested in what motivates people to post (or not post) things that they generally would not share with the stranger in line behind them at the grocery store.

 

You have never been in a grocery store with Whip and I. We talk to everybody about everything.

Posted

You mean other people can actually read this stuff :eek:

 

I didn't even think any of you people were real

Posted

Soooooooo Mitch

 

What you really want to know is.......

 

Why do we post????

 

What makes us post?????

 

What motivates us to spend so much time taking pix, sorting pix, cropping pix, posting pix, Photoshopping Richard's picture next to a rooster in a tree or Tom wading through the Rio Grande in Hugh Hefner's robe, then spending hours writing up Ride Tales to go with all those pix??????

 

Is that what your gettin at????

 

 

Whip

 

 

Posted

Small Hijack

You mean other people can actually read this stuff :eek:

 

I didn't even think any of you people were real

 

Just think of us all as the Keith Truman Show :lurk:

 

Now back to scheduled programming.

Joe Frickin' Friday
Posted
Soooooooo Mitch

 

What you really want to know is.......

 

Why do we post????

 

What makes us post?????

 

What motivates us to spend so much time taking pix, sorting pix, cropping pix, posting pix, Photoshopping Richard's picture next to a rooster in a tree or Tom wading through the Rio Grande in Hugh Hefner's robe, then spending hours writing up Ride Tales to go with all those pix??????

 

Is that what your gettin at????

 

I understand the desire to share our lives with our friends and family. I'm just curious to hear why some of us don't mind also sharing with strangers, and why some of us do mind.

Francois_Dumas
Posted
I'm just curious to hear why some of us don't mind also sharing with strangers, and why some of us do mind.

 

 

Think about this: what is a friend before he gets to be a friend ?

Posted
I'm just curious to hear why some of us don't mind also sharing with strangers, and why some of us do mind.

 

 

Think about this: what is a friend before he gets to be a friend ?

 

And who would you want behind you if you have a problem?

With my limited past exposure to the internet. I'm astounded constantly by this forum's helpfulness and humor.

I hope to become a part of that and share in a similar way. But as to WHY I want to I have no idea. :eek:

Posted

" I hope to become a part of that and share in a similar way. But as to WHY I want to I have no idea. :eek: "

 

Because "man" is social creature. I believe those who are more apt to self disclose to others are generally better adjusted and happier than those who don't..Just look at any woman, who does this more than men, and you'll see that when she's talking about her feelings she's quite happy..I learned long ago all I have to do to make my wife happy is get her talking about how she feels..As long as I don't make the mistake of saying something she's happy as a pig in slop! :wave:

bakerzdosen
Posted

OK Mitch, I'll take an actual stab at it from my perspective.

 

First of all, I don't reveal too much stuff on other boards. This board is different (as anybody that's been here a while knows.)

 

So, I'll start with "normal" internet boards. If I'm posting on another site, I'm anonymous. Bakerzdosen is just a screen name that I use everywhere because it's unique (meaning I don't have to come up with some new username every time I join a site.) So, most people seeing it on any other board will never associate me (the person) with that screen name. So, it affords some amount of anonymity. (I know that this board and google blow that out of the water, so it's falsely assumed anonymity.) If I reveal too much about me on another board, well, that could somehow be used against me. I'm not sure how exactly, but for some reason, we have it beat into our heads that people on the internet are dangerous. So, we don't really open up to them.

 

However, looking over this thread, I've met over half of the people who have posted face to face and several others I feel like I "know" on some level because we've PM'd back and forth and somehow interacted.

 

So, I don't feel like I'm revealing much about myself because, well, most people here already know me - at least on some level. The reverse is also true (I mean, we can't talk politics here, but is there really anyone here who wonders if Whip is a Democrat or a Republican? Well besides Whip. :) )

 

The fact that this has the potential to be read by any one of the billions of people in the world who has internet access is somewhat secondary. In that regard, even if I did reveal something that I wish I hadn't, there's still that whole "security through obscurity" principal that's present: There is just WAY too much information on the internet to really be able to wade through unless you're looking for some damning evidence about me... And if that's the case, well, I'm sure it could be found elsewhere as well.

 

So, to me, this place is just a buncha friends hanging out virtually until the next time they can actually do so in the flesh. It's just openly recorded for the world to see. I guess it's my own reality TV show. :)

Posted

For me this place as become somethin like the TV show "Cheers" we have fun, we laugh, we make fun of each other, we talk about Richard. ADV Rider is that "other Bar" where no one knows your name.

 

I want people to read how I feel about the other members of this board. I want them to see how much fun we have when we are together. I want members and peeps that don't come to enough events to wish they did and hope that by seein my stories and pix that it will influence their personal planning in the future so they can come join the fun and be a bigger part of this cyber family.

 

"Cheers ...where everyone knows your name.......

 

 

BTW.....Mitch, what ya doin Labor Day weekend????? I'll be visiting the homeland.

 

:grin:

 

 

Whip

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted

I enjoy reading what my buds are up to especially when I'm too busy too join in. So I like to return the favor and share what I'm up to whenever something worthy, possibly only to me, comes up. :wave:

Posted

I see this place, not as a family but as a tribe and while you may not completely trust everybody in the tribe there is found a higher general degree of trust than with regard to "those other ones." So, as we sit around the campfire of a night we say stuff in the dark that we might not say otherwise. Forgetting (or ignoring) as Mitch notes, that there are watchers out there.

 

As to what I post and why: I'll post all sorts of stuff, some of it sorta personal. Anyone who's read my posts over the years knows pretty well who I am psychosocially . . . but there's a fine but real distinction between knowing who I am (as a type) and some of my personal characteristics and knowing me. You'll not find that out from what I put here, not you and not anyone else now or in the future - it's private.

 

All that being said, Mitch makes a very good point when he says that your leavings here may cost you in unforeseen ways in the future. The example of an insurance underwriter is a good one, as is a potential boss - or a prosecutor. Here's an example of the lattermost of the list. A time or two here and in other forums I have made no bones about believing that there are humans who ought to be sent post-haste to the grave and someone who does it is performing a public service. Now let's say that under dire personal threat I do exactly that. A prosecutor googling my name (and they do) will find my statements to that effect. He can introduce them to a Grand Jury to support a request for indictment for murder as opposed to, say, manslaughter, to show that I was predisposed to kill when perhaps a lesser response would have been appropriate.

 

You lawyers can expand on that thought if you wish, but I think what I mean is clear.

 

Pilgrim

Posted

I think I'm only posting those personal things that I don't mind the world knowing. I try never to mention stealing hubcaps or cars, molesting small farm animals, cheating on my wife, or STDs I've loved and known. The opinions I've shared are who I am and I'm not afraid to state them to the general public.

That being said, just by posting here, I can be easily found by anyone who wants to break in a get a BMW motorcycle. Other personal info for theft purposes can also be found by digging in previous posts, so I may be assuming that there's not enough interest for anyone to seek me out.

 

 

Posted

The beauty of this place. You can share as much or as little as you wish and no one will criticize your choice.

 

The concept of privacy has long gone in America. There is no longer the expectation of privacy and will likely, in the near future, be no right to privacy either. I would state my reasons for think so, but political discussions are prohibited.

 

Sometimes it appears to have been cathartic for some of our members to have a place to express their emotions. Sometimes it is painful for me to read. But I admire their courage in doing so.

 

What impresses me is that most of the folks here are good people.

Posted

Being far more of an extrovert than introvert myself, of course I tend to get energized from the company/conversations of/with others - though certainly not all others - rather than getting energized from the solace of my own thoughts. That's part of why I'm here. Surely, those extrovert tendencies serve those who post here often very well.

 

That being said, I don't agree with your view (Billy) that a person with introverted tendencies is somehow less well adjusted. Clearly, your example of a relationship requires communication skills, which do tend to be within the realm of the extrovert skill set. However, the accuracy of the dialog's content (especially with regard to feelings) are not necessarily best served by the extrovert because introspection is not necessarily within the realm of the extrovert's natural skill set.

 

Furthermore, it could also be argued that some extroverts are that way because there never is any solace in their own thoughts or perhaps they don't have any thoughts. Therefore, it is perhaps not always a good thing to share everything.

 

So my point is that whatever a person's natural tendency (due to the myriad factors that affect our personalities and points throughout our lives), the well adjusted person is the one who can "tap into" the skillset that best serves the situation.

Jerry Johnston
Posted

Everything I've posted is a lie and I'm not really Jerry Johnston. :grin:

Francois_Dumas
Posted
Everything I've posted is a lie and I'm not really Jerry Johnston. :grin:

 

Does that also mean that it is NOT YOU in that avatar !!???

 

Owwwww...... Internet is SO disappointing at times !!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

:grin:

Posted
Primarily I was interested in what motivates people to post (or not post) things that they generally would not share with the stranger in line behind them at the grocery store.

 

 

I wouldn't post really personal stuff because I can't imagine why anyone else would be interested. I guess it's a corollary to what my wife has said more than once: 'everything with you is a goddamn state secret'. On the other hand, I have told a bartender or cab driver things because of the high expectation of anonymity. A sort of instant catharsis.

 

Geez, why did I tell you that? :eek:

RichEdwards
Posted

I have nothing to hide so I post everything about my life. I have been reluctant to say anything about my late 90's affair with Madonna. smirk.gif

Francois_Dumas
Posted
I have been reluctant to say anything about my late 90's affair with Madonna. smirk.gif

 

Owww, don't hold back Rich, you're amongst friends here!! Was it good !??

 

 

 

 

:lurk:

Joe Frickin' Friday
Posted
That being said, I don't agree with your view (Billy) that a person with introverted tendencies is somehow less well adjusted.

 

"Tendencies" or "preference" is one thing, but taken to an extreme - in either direction - it becomes pathological. Some people are painfully shy and struggle to avoid social situations that others find enriching - and OTOH there are people who can't stand to be alone with themselves and go out of their way to seek the company of others. I wouldn't describe either of those examples as well-adjusted.

 

FWIW I find that I need each from time to time. In solitude I am not beholden to anyone for anything - it's as complete a freedom as one can experience - but then I'm also happy to compromise that in order to enjoy the companionship of other folks.

Posted
You mean other people can actually read this stuff :eek:

 

I didn't even think any of you people were real

 

They're real all right, it's just that they won't remember any of it in two days. So we should be OK.

Posted
I wouldn't post really personal stuff because I can't imagine why anyone else would be interested.

 

....and anyone that IS interested, is most likely the very person you DON'T want reading your posts.

bakerzdosen
Posted
That being said, I don't agree with your view (Billy) that a person with introverted tendencies is somehow less well adjusted.

 

"Tendencies" or "preference" is one thing, but taken to an extreme - in either direction - it becomes pathological. Some people are painfully shy and struggle to avoid social situations that others find enriching - and OTOH there are people who can't stand to be alone with themselves and go out of their way to seek the company of others. I wouldn't describe either of those examples as well-adjusted.

Just so we're clear that introverted!=shy and vice versa.
Joe Frickin' Friday
Posted
Just so we're clear that introverted!=shy and vice versa.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraversion_and_introversion

 

Seems you're right (at least according to Wikipedia), in that shyness is motivated by fear of social situations, whereas introversion is motivated by simple preference.

Posted

If everyone would just post their credit card and pin numbers I could get you know you that much better. :grin::dopeslap:

Posted
If everyone would just post their credit card and pin numbers I could get you know you that much better. :grin::dopeslap:
Sure ... Mitch's number is ... :grin:
Lone_RT_rider
Posted
If everyone would just post their credit card and pin numbers I could get you know you that much better. :grin::dopeslap:
Sure ... Mitch's number is ...

 

1-800-IRSMART :grin::dopeslap:

Posted

No problem, I was pretty early into credit cards, my VISA number is

 

4000-0000-0000-0011

bakerzdosen
Posted
Just so we're clear that introverted!=shy and vice versa.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraversion_and_introversion

 

Seems you're right (at least according to Wikipedia), in that shyness is motivated by fear of social situations, whereas introversion is motivated by simple preference.

David posted a great article on introverts a couple of years ago. It's something I wished I'd run across a few years earlier than that... (despite having taken Myers/Briggs several times.)

Posted
Just so we're clear that introverted!=shy and vice versa.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraversion_and_introversion

 

Seems you're right (at least according to Wikipedia), in that shyness is motivated by fear of social situations, whereas introversion is motivated by simple preference.

David posted a great article on introverts a couple of years ago. It's something I wished I'd run across a few years earlier than that... (despite having taken Myers/Briggs several times.)

 

Is that the one where they tell you how to tell if an engineer is an extrovert?

 

Pilgrim

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