Hey all you muddertruckers out there! :-))

[TEWKS]

Ford has this pretty cool app (probably nothing all that ground breaking) but it lets you build your own truck. Here’s a configuration and a couple colors I like.

 

Build your truck here. 
 

Oh, and I’m really sorry if you’re a Chevy guy. No really! 

 

 

[BamaJohn]

You''re confusing me Pat....   You''re going from a Porsche Boxster to a Ford pick-um-up?  

[wbw6cos]

I see all these advertisements on television for new vehicles.  Closed course/professional driver, just come on down, zero interest, blah, blah, blah!   The problem is that they seem like everything is normal and there is absolutely no issue with availablity!  Sup wit dat?  

[TEWKS]

2 hours ago, BamaJohn said:

You''re confusing me Pat....   You''re going from a Porsche Boxster to a Ford pick-um-up?  

John, you should try being me!    I guess I’m easily distracted by shiny objects. 

[Rougarou]

Dude, where you been,.....all the manufacturers let you "build your own".  

 

Bump to the Lariat, get the Star White Metallic,....only a $795 option

[Hosstage]

2 hours ago, wbw6cos said:

I see all these advertisements on television for new vehicles.  Closed course/professional driver, just come on down, zero interest, blah, blah, blah!   The problem is that they seem like everything is normal and there is absolutely no issue with availablity!  Sup wit dat?  

Successful promotions do not mention the problems, they build interest and excitement.

"We have these awesome cars that can race to win, jump over dilapidated bridges, and coddle your backside like you've never known.

You can't have one."

Doesn't really sell well...

[Rinkydink]

6 hours ago, wbw6cos said:

I see all these advertisements on television for new vehicles.  Closed course/professional driver, just come on down, zero interest, blah, blah, blah!   The problem is that they seem like everything is normal and there is absolutely no issue with availablity!  Sup wit dat?  

To me, advertising is just out of control lying. Six paragraphs of unreadable fine print crawling across the bottom of your tv screen.

 

Runny nose,?, take “Syquiblex”. May cause anal leakage, cancer, blurred vision, tremors, nausea etc etc. At least you won’t have a runny nose.
 

my personal favorite

Do not take this medicine if you’re allergic to it. 

 

Old Billy was right…

[Hosstage]

Can anyone tell me if the claims in the penis repair ads are true?

Asking for a friend.

[TEWKS]

1 hour ago, Hosstage said:

Can anyone tell me if the claims in the penis repair ads are true?

Asking for a friend.

The online reviews were flaccid. 

[Hosstage]

Just now, TEWKS said:

The online reviews were flaccid. 

Well that's not good, said my friend.

[John Ranalletta]

13 hours ago, TEWKS said:

Ford has this pretty cool app (probably nothing all that ground breaking) but it lets you build your own truck. Here’s a configuration and a couple colors I like.

 

Build your truck here. 
 

Oh, and I’m really sorry if you’re a Chevy guy. No really! 

 

 

 

Make life easy.  Just order this:

 

 

[Rougarou]

Ya, that's the ticket

 

 

Waaay back when, my brother had a 1979 F-150 that he was trading in.  He let me drive it until his new vehicle came in (he had a spare).  Anyway, at 15, one is invincible.  I was going to see my friend that lived in a bunch of rice fields.  To get to his place, you turn down a paved road that transitions to gravel then a little semi-steep bridge.  Time for a jump.  Bone stock F150, I hit the bridge, airborne for a few seconds, bottomed out, gravel flying all up around me, and in my head, I just though my life ended 'cause my brother was gonna beat me to death if the truck was more messed up than what it already was.  Heart thumping, I got out, gave a once over, ensuring I checked the oil pan for gashes, nope, nothing, truck was fine,....got in, floored it fish tailing to my friends house.

 

Life was grand when you were invincible!!!!

[TEWKS]

Almost similar story. (well not really)  My first F150 was my brother’s old truck, it was a 1979 also which does sound similar.  It was my second vehicle so I’m guessing I was about 18 at the time.
 

Anyway, I was out impressing a female friend of mine (or at least trying like heck to) so I took her out behind the old landfill for some four wheeling. It was winter so the little pond out there was frozen over. (sure it was) There was a trail on the other side that led out to the street. 
 

Now I could of easily gone around the pond but hammering across had to be more impressive, right?  (I knew it was only three feet deep)

 

Spinning up the big mud tires it had fitted, I hit it hard. Halfway across, the ice gives way and all hell breaks loose! I kept my foot mashed to the floor with ice chunks flying off the windshield and down along the side of the truck! 
 

Somehow I made it through  and yeah I jumped out to inspect for damage.  None at all! Unless, you want to count the not impressing my female friend? 

[Hosstage]

The two most dangerous words ever spoken: Watch This!

[TEWKS]

3 hours ago, Hosstage said:

The two most dangerous words ever spoken: Watch This!

It’s usually the four words leading up to those that are the ones that’ll getcha every time! The ever so famous “Hold my beer and” watch this!    
 I have no personal experience with that sorta stuff.

[Scott9999]

10 hours ago, Hosstage said:

Can anyone tell me if the claims in the penis repair ads are true?

Asking for a friend.

My experienced friend said not only "No", but "HELL NO!".  🙄 😏  Then he added ".... and don't ask me know I know!".

[Scott9999]

6 hours ago, TEWKS said:

Almost similar story. (well not really)  My first F150 was my brother’s old truck, it was a 1979 also which does sound similar.  It was my second vehicle so I’m guessing I was about 18 at the time.
 

Anyway, I was out impressing a female friend of mine (or at least trying like heck to) so I took her out behind the old landfill for some four wheeling. It was winter so the little pond out there was frozen over. (sure it was) There was a trail on the other side that led out to the street. 
 

Now I could of easily gone around the pond but hammering across had to be more impressive, right?  (I knew it was only three feet deep)

 

Spinning up the big mud tires it had fitted, I hit it hard. Halfway across, the ice gives way and all hell breaks loose! I kept my foot mashed to the floor with ice chunks flying off the windshield and down along the side of the truck! 
 

Somehow I made it through  and yeah I jumped out to inspect for damage.  None at all! Unless, you want to count the not impressing my female friend? 

OHHHHH, boyyyy, those high school memories.  What you did!  You just trigged one I haven't thought of in 30+ years with your words "impressing a female friend".   🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄😖

 

I drove the pickup my dad had configured for customer deliveries.  It had the store's sign painted all over it, but hey, I was sixteen, and driving that straight six, 3-on-the-tree like a professional race driver (Dad was always wondering about why the clutches never lasted; I told him it was the women he had working at his store, who couldn't shift properly. 🤣😯.  But I digress ...).   Anyhow, I'd borrowed it to help set up a high school activity.  I had two of the hottest cheer leaders in the school in the truck on the bench seat, as we were transporting stuff from houses to school.  They seemed genuinely impressed and life was grand. 

 

After parking it in the school lot, and unloading, we all jumped in for another run.   As I backed out, we all heard a "CRUNCH!!!".   Now, the parking lot was nearly deserted, i.e. not another vehicle nearby.   We were all kind of in shock, thinking "WTF?!!".  I got out, embarrassed, of course, and looked at the truck over.  I quickly checked the front, side, the rear, saw nothing, jumped back in and said "No problems, ladies, lets' roll."    As I continued to back out, the CRUNCH got louder, and then there was a distinctive "SNAP" as the truck shuttered.   At that point, I probably went from red faced to black-and-blue faced with embarrassment.  We ALL jumped out, and I could tell from the girls reaction that I had missed something pretty significant on the PASSENGER'S side.  We were parked adjacent to a pedestrian reserved space, and to enforce that, the school had installed stout metal posts filled with concrete.  But of course, someone on the maintenance staff figured out how to economize, and made the posts only about 3 feet high, BELOW the drivers line of sight.   In short, I'd nearly torn off the right front fender of the truck, running up against one of those posts as I turned while backing out of the space.   Dad was less than happy to have his only delivery vehicle in the body shop. 😨  My next six weeks pay was gone.

 

As with young TEWKS situation, I certainly impressed those nice young ladies, i.e. they probably thought I was an utter imbecile, and lol, they were probably right.   Sixteen year old male hormones', pretty girls, and a pickup truck, rarely work out as the sixteen year old expects.

[Scott9999]

4 hours ago, TEWKS said:

It’s usually the four words leading up to those that are the ones that’ll getcha every time! The ever so famous “Hold my beer and” watch this!    
 I have no personal experience with that sorta stuff.

Who knew that firefighters were liars? 🤷‍♂️  (Well, everyone, I guess, but at least they're VERY GOOD, fairly funny liars.  My retired fire Captain buddy next door, can certainly pull it off well.   🤣🤣)

[TEWKS]

You’re only a liar if you get caught. 

[Skywagon]

8 minutes ago, TEWKS said:

You’re only a liar if you get caught

So said Bill Clinton  

[Rougarou]

8 hours ago, Scott9999 said:

OHHHHH, boyyyy, those high school memories.  What you did!  You just trigged one I haven't thought of in 30+ years with your words "impressing a female friend".   🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄😖

 

I drove the pickup my dad had configured for customer deliveries.  It had the store's sign painted all over it, but hey, I was sixteen, and driving that straight six, 3-on-the-tree like a professional race driver (Dad was always wondering about why the clutches never lasted; I told him it was the women he had working at his store, who couldn't shift properly. 🤣😯.  But I digress ...).   Anyhow, I'd borrowed it to help set up a high school activity.  I had two of the hottest cheer leaders in the school in the truck on the bench seat, as we were transporting stuff from houses to school.  They seemed genuinely impressed and life was grand. 

 

After parking it in the school lot, and unloading, we all jumped in for another run.   As I backed out, we all heard a "CRUNCH!!!".   Now, the parking lot was nearly deserted, i.e. not another vehicle nearby.   We were all kind of in shock, thinking "WTF?!!".  I got out, embarrassed, of course, and looked at the truck over.  I quickly checked the front, side, the rear, saw nothing, jumped back in and said "No problems, ladies, lets' roll."    As I continued to back out, the CRUNCH got louder, and then there was a distinctive "SNAP" as the truck shuttered.   At that point, I probably went from red faced to black-and-blue faced with embarrassment.  We ALL jumped out, and I could tell from the girls reaction that I had missed something pretty significant on the PASSENGER'S side.  We were parked adjacent to a pedestrian reserved space, and to enforce that, the school had installed stout metal posts filled with concrete.  But of course, someone on the maintenance staff figured out how to economize, and made the posts only about 3 feet high, BELOW the drivers line of sight.   In short, I'd nearly torn off the right front fender of the truck, running up against one of those posts as I turned while backing out of the space.   Dad was less than happy to have his only delivery vehicle in the body shop. 😨  My next six weeks pay was gone.

 

As with young TEWKS situation, I certainly impressed those nice young ladies, i.e. they probably thought I was an utter imbecile, and lol, they were probably right.   Sixteen year old male hormones', pretty girls, and a pickup truck, rarely work out as the sixteen year old expects.

 

Scewl parking lots, ugh.

 

My mom had a 1980 Chebby Impala that my brother picked up at an auction for $500 in 1985.  I'm at my skewl, we could leave campus for lunch.  The parking area had telephone poles laid out so as you wouldn't go in the grass.  Lunch bell rings, me and a couple friends always went to the store where my mom worked (as did many from the skewl), so, impatiently waiting to back out of the parking space, I said screw it, telephone pole aint that big, I'ma go over it.  I did,....and the pole scraped the bottom of the car.  The only thing it did was separate the exhaust, which gave it a nice "rumble".  Shrug the shoulders, drive to the store and my mom clearly hears her car rumbling in.  She asked what I did, I told her, she told me I had better fix that.....I's like Ma, it sounds pretty good,....she wasn't having it.  So, when I got home, I crawled under and re-attached the exahust pipe.  She was mad, but not that mad.

 

 

[Rinkydink]

My older brother and I borrowed moms car to visit our local Honda shop one Saturday. My brother cut a corner too sharp and clipped a pole with the rear passenger side quarter panel. Like the good boys we were he drove it back home and parked it. Of course he threatened me if I told. The next day mom goes to grocery store and when she arrives home she comes in pissed telling my dad how someone hit her car in the Safeway parking lot. A couple of years later we came clean. 

[TEWKS]

Statute of limitations was up?  

[Hosstage]

When kids are 16-18 years old, all cars must be destroyed. Mission accomplished.

I don't know dad, we came out from eating pizza and it was like that 

[Scott9999]

Oh, my, memories are flooding in, with TEWKS and Rougarou's posts.  I've got one more to share:

 

So,  twenty years after the event in my last post, I'M NOW THE DAD with the 16 year old son.  I had a ten year old Nissan pickup, still pretty nice, but it had some miles and some wear on it.  My son got his license, and rather than have Momma take my son and his younger sister daily to high school in the next town, we let him use the truck.  (In his mind, it was now "his truck"!  😡  It was gonna be eventually, but he kind of jumped the gun, which ticked off my daughter, who also wanted it.)

 

So, I'm coming home from an 36 hour all-nighter (i.e. software engineers, ya know? 🙄).  It's raining, just a torrential rain (North San Diego County, California).  The street they usually took to school was under 3-4 inches of water, like curb to curb water, and the highway which included a bridge crossing was a mess.   So, I called my son, who I knew was getting ready to leave on his first day driving to school.   I told him about the conditions, and DIRECTED him to take an alternate route, which I described in precise detail (including the speed limits).  He acknowledged, I'd done my "dad" duty, crisis averted, and figured that I could go home and get some Z's before I had to go do it all over again.   

 

Not ten minutes had passed, I was almost to the house, when my son calls.   "Dad, I ...uh... I had a little problem in the truck".   Turns out, he ignored every word of my advice, drove through the water, took the highway to the bridge, took the corner into the bridge too fast and accelerated, losing the back end, and ended up in the concrete bridge abutment.  I thought, "Unbelievable!  My 16 year old son had IGNORED my directives."   (Only unbelievable because I had forgotten what I was like at age 16.😲)

 

I did the "dad" thingy well, didn't raise my voice, checked to ensure everyone was still healthy, that the truck was still drivable, and waited until he got home that night to inspect the damage, and have "the talk".  

 

My son was somewhat contrite (i.e. enough, he thought, to bamboozle the old man), and explained that he'd take care of the FULL repair cost.  He'd taken out the right front fender, with not much other damage.  Lol, he already had the price and source of the fiberglass fenders HE was going to install on HIS truck, to turn it into a Baja style off-road truck.  🙄😖).  Again, daughter pissed, and I assured her that we'd get her HER pickup when she was ready, which just confirmed her belief that she was the second class citizen "milkman's" baby. 🙄🙄🙄  (Dang, this "Dad" stuff sucks sometimes.)

 

Anyhow, the upshot on that story is that my son never had another accident to this day, and he's in his early 30's, raising HIS infant son.  😁  I can't WAIT to "help" him out, as my grandson grows up, while watching my son's own "daddy" battles.  Revenge can be sweet.🤣  Same thing happened when he dropped his first street bike (which is another great story I'll share, when I'm not busy monopolizing someone else's thread, and taking it WAY off topic.)  After that first accident, he was solid on a street bike, whether he was stunting at 25 mph, or breaking the sound barrier at 160 MPH on California freeways at 2AM, accompanied by his military police Marine buddy. 😲😱😖😖😖 (This "dad" stuff is REALLY hard, sometimes.)    Of course, on dirt since age 8, well, he broke lots of stuff, on himself an his bikes, but that's supposed to happen. 😏  He turned out OK, though.  Kids usually do, if only they can survive their youth.

[Rougarou]

I did slightly jump a Pinto,.....yes,....I had a Pinto.  Small hiccup at the river, previous heavy rain, mashed it for all those two cylinders could do in the short amount of distance I had, popped up, plopped down, examine for issues, oil bleeding out the bottom, gashed pan.  Drove home bleeding the engines life away and parked, got mom's Impala and ran over a telephone pole(no, not same day).  Little engine was smokin' fairly good, but meh, got the pan replaced a few months before I left for bootcamp, sold the car for 'bout $300......and it still ran,....barely.....but it ran.

 

 

[TEWKS]

Think I told my Dodge Dart story before. Slant Six motor with a caved in rear quarter that I piled on about thirty pounds of bondo. (you know, to make it look better ) 

 

Anyway, that thing hit some pit party mud bogs that’d have 4X4’s blushing! Tried as I might to kill it, it was still running when I took over my brother’s f150.

 

I think I’ve got an old photo of both of them parked together. I’ll see if I can find it.

[TEWKS]

I’ll have to keep looking for the Dart pic. Here’s a sucky pic of the F 150. The Monte Carlo in the pic was my first new vehicle. I got that after many hours of pounding the pavement in that 1970 Autocar tractor in the background. It had Armstrong steering BTW. 

 

My pop’s 77 F 250, me and my 81 GS 1100. I shouldn’t of survived that motorcycle at that age. 

[Rougarou]

I like that Monte.

 

There's a local guy has three of them, all pristine looking,.....at least from the road.  He parks them in the front yard for show.

[TEWKS]

Yeah, I should of been smart like my next street over neighbor and kept it. He still has his in pristine condition. Unfortunately he’s not doing too well.

[Rougarou]

31 minutes ago, TEWKS said:

 Unfortunately he’s not doing too well.

 

That's called opportunity!!

 

Dark, but funny.

 

We were at an auction one day and my wife was bidding on "something" I don't recall.  Anyway, an old guy, like on a walker barely alive old guy was bidding against my wife.  He eventually out bid her limit.  My wife leans in to me and says.  "no worries, I'll be at his estate auction in a few weeks"........man, I dig that woman.

[MachineJoe]

On 2/8/2022 at 4:37 PM, Hosstage said:

The two most dangerous words ever spoken: Watch This!

and    "Hold my Beer"  but that's 3 words

[Red]

I worked for a retired navy chief for a few years.  He mostly served aboard ships.  He said the most dangerous words on the ship were, "Hey, watch this shit"

[Hosstage]

If you find yourself uttering any version of those words, STOP whatever you are about to do!

[TEWKS]

@MikeB60

 

Hey Mike, how are you liking your new truck so far? Any comments on it would be appreciated.  Engine, mileage, a picture or two…

[Rougarou]

10 minutes ago, TEWKS said:

@MikeB60

 

 mileage, 

 

Hahaha,......it's a truck, shouldn't be a concern  A nice side benefit, but shouldn't be a decision factor for a truck.

 

 

 

 

[TEWKS]

More gas less beer!  Kinda kidding, last beer I had was at last year’s START rally. It’s going to be the place for the next one too. 

 

My ecoboost is pulling 14 unloaded right now which kinda sucks IMO. The Coyote seems to be ringing up 19. Better, more beer! 

[Rougarou]

Wife's 6.0 GMC squoze out 24ish empty hauling on the hwy.  She routinely stays at bout 21-22 for her commutes (25m one way).  When I drive 'round town, 19ish.

[TEWKS]

GMC 
 

No, that’s pretty damn good actually! 

[Rougarou]

3 minutes ago, TEWKS said:

GMC 
 

No, that’s pretty damn good actually! 

 

Ya, I know, I'da preferred she went back to Ford, but, her truck, her choice

[MikeB60]

I love it.  The 3.5 ecoboost is a beast.  I have a very heavy right foot but can manage 19 MPG on the highway. 

[MikeB60]

Do your homework on the new Coyote.  For 2021 they went to variable displacement and a belt driven oil pump. No Bueno for me.

[TEWKS]

Yeah, cylinder deactivation. Seems like a weak link in the system. Now, the 5.0 Mustang motor doesn’t play that game? 
 

 

[Rougarou]

The 6.0 GMC drops to four cylinders

[MikeB60]

3 hours ago, TEWKS said:

Yeah, cylinder deactivation. Seems like a weak link in the system. Now, the 5.0 Mustang motor doesn’t play that game? 
 

Nope!

 

 

[Hosstage]

3 hours ago, Rougarou said:

The 6.0 GMC drops to four cylinders

I believe that feature can be deactivated, if desired.

[TEWKS]

3 hours ago, Rougarou said:

The 6.0 GMC drops to four cylinders

Hey Richard, does the GMC vibrate when it goes into eco mode? 

[Rougarou]

12 hours ago, TEWKS said:

Hey Richard, does the GMC vibrate when it goes into eco mode? 

Gooder?

[TEWKS]

Shaky pic shaking truck, just trying to be a wise guy is all.