Things Overheard in Torrey

[EffBee]

I thought this might be a good way for everyone to pool their thoughts and experiences regarding Torrey X. I'll start:

 

"Are you serious about leaving from Mesquite at 5:30AM? Doncha mean 7:30?"

--unnamed rider who decided sleeping in was the better choice

 

"Who's that on Channel Two-Oh?"

"Kyle and Jim from Santa Rosa. Who are you?"

"Fernando and Bruce from SoCal."

"THE Fernando Belair?"

"HEY, whatever those rangers in Zion told you I did, they're lying."

--FRS convo with Kyle and Jim when we ran into them on UT-12, just short of Escalante

 

"I'm gonna KILL that sumbijj who blocked my bike in up against my room so I can't get it out in the morning. Why that worthless, no-good so-n-so. I oughta tear right through that little gap and rip his saddlebags off with my Jessies."

--Marty Hill, a little miffed and perplexed, but mostly playing it up

 

"Uh, Marty. That's Lisa's bike. You want me to get her so you can chew her a new one?"

--Gleno

 

"This may just be the finest road I've ever ridden on a motorcycle."

--Barry Stevens over the FRS radio as we crested Huntington Canyon

 

"Radar!!! Radar ahead. There he is. I see him. He's got someone pulled over. Never mind. We're safe. CRAP, he's got Paul."

-John Benedict refering to Paul Mihalka who had gotten ahead of our group on the return from Huntington Canyon (UT31)

 

"He let me go with a warning for 87 in a 65."

--Paul Mihalka when he caught up to us after a Utah Deputy had pulled him over

 

"Hell, yes!"

--Bruce Scott, who rode UT31 with the group on Friday, when asked if he wanted to go ride it again on Saturday

 

"Am I the only one who finds this topography erotic?"

--Barry Stevens (bes) on the lonely, desolate vistas prevalent during the first 15 miles of UT10

 

"Barry misses his wife."

--unnamed FRS respondent

 

"It's so good to see Ron here."

--Everyone, refering to Ron Barthelme who has recovered enough from a serious stroke last year to make the pilgrimage from IL to Torrey on his RT.

 

 

Add your conversations, observations, things overheard and other personal anecdotes below.

[Dennis Andress]

"Alright guys let's get going or we'll get behind a bunch of RV's"

"But it's so beautiful here, can't we stay a bit longer?"

"Of course it's beautiful. Zion means 'where God walks.'"

"See! He walks. He doesn't run."

"??"

-- Conversation between David Feibush and I while stopped for pictures.

[Joel]

"You're not really the nipple who posted all that sh!t, are you?"

-- Gleno, after he read my "Ophra Hazard" name tag. (Needless to say, I stayed away from the edge of the pool Friday night.)

 

"I made it in 3 days, no problem."

-- Raaaaan

[JB-BMW]

"What's the altitude of Utah?"

- asked by a certain Queen of Lean in Panquitch

"Here or the whole state?"

- a slightly incredulous JB-BMW

"6800 feet"

- highly amused local rancher

"I'm staying out of this"

- highly intelligent RussellW

[JerryMather]

The funniest thing I heard this weekend was a story about the Hottie that works in the bakery.

Some guy was putting the moves on her and asked her out after her shift was over. When he asked her for her phone number, Randys dauther in law came out from around the front counter and yelled out, "Her number is 1 800 I'm only 14"

[russell_bynum]

The coolest thing I heard at Torrey:

 

"I'm back"

-Raaaan

 

[90%angel]

"what would Marty Hill do? Take out his 9 and bust a cap!"

--Gleno, after doing a hilarious impersonation of a REALLY frickin' upset Marty Hill

 

"Jeez, I was gonna move my bike Marty! I had no idea the grief I caused!"

--ME, after I figured out Marty had been fuming about my bike for 6 hours!

 

"[after hugs], aw sheesh, I'm sorry. I should've gone over there and looked at the bike, I just assumed it was that clown from the other day being a smart ass...if I'd known it was you, it wouldn't have been an issue!"

--Marty, after everything was explained

 

"shocker"

--Gleno, giving a name to the gesture. I'm not going to explain the gesture.

 

"I didn't have a good morning"

--Meghan Twiss, with Brian going "WHOOOOOAAAAA" [vomit sounds] in the background

 

"So that bike's a son of a bitch, eh" (me)

"No, I think it's past that...I'm leaning toward..." (well, I'll just bleep the rest)

--Laney

 

"Anyone else want to play with my balls?"

--Richard (BeniciaRT)

[Marty Hill]

Gleno was great at impersonating me going nuts. When he told me it was your bike, I almost fell down.

 

Oh well, it wa good for a few laughs.

[MikesToy]

Marty..

I don't appreciate being called a clown. I did not mean to block you on Friday afternoon and when you asked me to move, I did!! I believe it took me less than five minutes to unload and move the bike.

[russell_bynum]

Mike,

Don't sweat it, Marty calls everyone a clown. Besides...it takes one to know one, right?

 

[MikesToy]

With the size of my belly, I can see it would be easy to make the assumption I'm a clown

[russell_bynum]

"I saw some other riders in the oncomming lane, so I waved at them as I eased through the sweeper at a buck-forty"

--Sam

 

At the reception on Friday: "Who came the farthest to get here?" - Dick

<Raises his hand> - Bob Palin

 

"I gave up my K-bike for this?"

-- JB-BMW prior to the power-commander-ectomy on his twinspark RT

 

"Where's Wurty when you need him" - Fernando, after passing a herd of sheep on 31.

 

"Wurrrrrtttyyyyyyy" -Sheep on 31

 

"I wish I had brought a motorcycle up here instead of my RT." - Me

[Dennis Andress]

Stopping for lunch Saturday afternoon at the Capitol Reef Cafe. There were four of us, loud and boisterous after a good ride. In the corner sat a yuppy looking couple trying not to be noticed. After taking my gear off and stashing it I dropped my key on their table as I walked past. Then over my shoulder I said:

 

"Go ahead. I just filled it up."

 

She had a big grin on her face. He turned red and tried to slide under the table.

[Les is more]

Goo-goo, gurgle, gurgle, Waaah, Waaaah, Waaaaah! Burp, Goo, Dah!

 

No, I wasn't hanging out with Marty Hill.

 

I was babysitting for Baby Bear, 7 month old son of Gregori and Chris. I hope they enjoyed the magic that is Torrey. I certainly enjoyed my time with their little one.

[VladtheImpaler]

"I thought we came here to ride motorcycles not ponies?" Fernando to unnamed.

[BeniciaRT_GT]

"I'm tired of going over a 100!!!

G-D@mn!t, SLOW DOWN!!!!"

 

My somewhat not amused SO on the way home.

 

This did make me have to re-think my choice of partners!

And this in a CAR no less.

 

Also:

 

"These guys are nuts doing the 900 miles in a day! I'm not getting up that early and there is no way I'm going to make that trip in one day!"

 

Joe G. the night before doing exactly that!

 

Also:

 

"Well it was no big deal really."

 

Marty Hill to Lisa once the whole story came out in the parking lot in that unique Gleno fashion.

 

Also:

 

Sam Gendler's: "If your good, you can add a tickler to the shocker."

 

And my personal favorite:

 

"Your balls are filthy, look at all those fingerprints on them...No, I'm not going to wash them for you, but I will play with them more if you clean them up!"

 

Laney to me.

[skinny_tom (aka boney)]

"Your balls are filthy, look at all those fingerprints on them...No, I'm not going to wash them for you, but I will play with them more if you clean them up!"

 

I suppose this means you found them? Unless you went out and got a replacement set.

[90%angel]

Didn't Laney also say

"I can see myself in your balls!"

 

Or was that someone else?

 

Oh, and while I'm just ticking everyone off, I might as well admit my comment that ruffled Bob's feathers (of course in a "mock anger" kind of way!)

 

Someone: "what was the problem?"

Me: "Russell's tires were as bald as Bob's head"

Bob: "oh, thank you so much!"

(oh you know I love you Bob!)

 

And my all time favorite Torrey quote, even though it didn't happen this time, was when Steve Asvitt got pulled over by the very same park ranger that had bagged him the Torrey before, and the dude says "Didn't we have this conversation LAST year!?"

[90%angel]

More crazy quotes:

 

At the Restaurant on Saturday:

Fernando: What's in the special again? What kind of meat?

[waiter rattles off all kinds of meat...duck, quail, chicken, etc., etc.)

Fernando: So roadkill stew then?

 

At the Denny's on the way home, Russell was talking about how my bike probably needs a spline lube. Gleno doesn't comment on this, UNTIL:

(as I am trying to order:) "She also needs her splines lubed"

The waitress just looked real confused, I turned three shades of red, then ordered the wrong thing I was so flustered!

[Bob Palin]

ruffled Bob's feathers

 

Someone: "what was the problem?"

Me: "Russell's tires were as bald as Bob's head"

Bob: "oh, thank you so much!"

Wouldn't have been so bad if I'd got any feathers to ruffle!

[AdventurePoser]

Your avatar is scary enough...

 

Steve

[BeniciaRT_GT]

"Your balls are filthy, look at all those fingerprints on them...No, I'm not going to wash them for you, but I will play with them more if you clean them up!"

 

I suppose this means you found them? Unless you went out and got a replacement set.

 

I can't find them if you still have them!!! (I'm not convinced of your innocence, in case you can't tell!)

 

I have multiple pair in multiple places, so I'm never far from a good feel!

[Marty Hill]

Just sent an apology to Mike. Hope that ends it. My bad.

[AdventurePoser]

Just sent an apology to Mike. Hope that ends it. My bad.

 

He's prolly taking up a collection to have you rubbed out even as we keyboard...

 

When are you coming back out to CA, Marty?

 

Steve

[Marty Hill]

Bike is in tucson, might get lost on the way home. I'll let you know if I head in the wrong direction.

[skinny_tom (aka boney)]

might get lost on the way home

 

Let me know too.

 

By the way Mike, if it's any consolation, Marty was swearing at me the second day I knew him, and he hasn't stopped.

[bes]

Sitting across from Russell and Lisa in the restaurant Sat eve. "something something track school........I was at 128 indicated" Funny how people grow alike when they get old, for it was Lisa, not Russell.......Then I went to the bathroom, unzipped and heard in a bellowing voice from the dining room "Yah Baby", how did Glen know? And the voice of Fernando as I was running to hot and to wide on 72 LEAN BARRY ....Thank You All..

[Ron_B]

On Saturday night, there was a very weird, somewhat skeery and ultimately hilarious discussion about how Arizona Al could...uh..."expand" his product line.

 

[KMG_365]

"Your balls are filthy, look at all those fingerprints on them...No, I'm not going to wash them for you, but I will play with them more if you clean them up!"

 

I suppose this means you found them? Unless you went out and got a replacement set.

 

I can't find them if you still have them!!! (I'm not convinced of your innocence, in case you can't tell!)

 

I have multiple pair in multiple places, so I'm never far from a good feel!

 

 

You all are amatuers! I know who the real "Belle of the Ball(s)" is: Mama Hoon!

 

[BeniciaRT_GT]

 

You all are amatuers! I know who the real "Belle of the Ball(s)" is: Mama Hoon!

 

 

That may be true...However, mine are solid, not hollow!!!

 

[Dennis Andress]

We were riding, at an acceptable speed, towards Torrey on Thursday when a Highway Patrol passed the other way waving his hand at us and slowing down fast. He kept going....

 

Not a minute later a second patrol came around the corner, across the double yellow, lights on and radar too. There was no where to go, we were stopped cold on the shoulder....

 

"I've got a wide load right behind me." said the officer.

 

I found I could breathe again.

[Bob Palin]

We were riding, at an acceptable speed, towards Torrey on Thursday when a Highway Patrol passed the other way waving his hand at us and slowing down fast. He kept going....

 

Not a minute later a second patrol came around the corner, across the double yellow, lights on and radar too. There was no where to go, we were stopped cold on the shoulder....

 

"I've got a wide load right behind me." said the officer.

 

I found I could breathe again.

Was it a houseboat? If so they sure are taking their time move that thing, I came across it near Delta about 3 weeks ago and had the same experience as you with the cops.

[Dennis Andress]

We were riding, at an acceptable speed, towards Torrey on Thursday when a Highway Patrol passed the other way waving his hand at us and slowing down fast. He kept going....

 

Not a minute later a second patrol came around the corner, across the double yellow, lights on and radar too. There was no where to go, we were stopped cold on the shoulder....

 

"I've got a wide load right behind me." said the officer.

 

I found I could breathe again.

Was it a houseboat? If so they sure are taking their time move that thing, I came across it near Delta about 3 weeks ago and had the same experience as you with the cops.

 

No, it was an extra wide mobile home. Left about 4 feet of road on each side.

[EffBee]

We were riding, at an acceptable speed, towards Torrey on Thursday when a Highway Patrol passed the other way waving his hand at us and slowing down fast. He kept going....

 

Not a minute later a second patrol came around the corner, across the double yellow, lights on and radar too. There was no where to go, we were stopped cold on the shoulder....

 

"I've got a wide load right behind me." said the officer.

 

I found I could breathe again.

 

When we encountered the UHP and the trailer, our speed WASN'T so acceptable. We came over a rise in the Escalante Staircase (just past Calf Creek), to discover the UHP car facing us, stopped in our lane, multiple lights flashing and the headlights doing their strobe thing.

 

We slowed quickly and as we approached he swung into HIS lane and motioned us over to the right shoulder. We knew we were dead. Air Bear, Smokey in the Sky or something had clocked us, for sure. We pulled over and he idles on by and yells, "We've got an oversized load coming about two minutes down the road. Stay here until it passes."

 

I know what you mean about being able to breathe again.

[90%angel]

"something something track school........I was at 128 indicated"

 

I think I said

"I couldn't get this pig any faster than 128 indicated, which is probably only 120 in reality...what's up with that?!"

[MidLife]

ruffled Bob's feathers

 

Someone: "what was the problem?"

Me: "Russell's tires were as bald as Bob's head"

Bob: "oh, thank you so much!"

Wouldn't have been so bad if I'd got any feathers to ruffle!

 

Bob- Just grow them back on your face. That way you won't have to update your avatar

[russell_bynum]

I couldn't get this pig any faster than 128 indicated, which is probably only 120 in reality...what's up with that?!"

 

You're just pissed because I passed you at a buck thirty-five indicated at 3/4 throttle on Timmer's ST.