The world's best passenger complaint letter?

[Boffin]

From an un-named passenger to Sir Richard Branson: Linky

 

Anyway, this is all irrelevant at the moment. I was raised strictly but neatly by my parents and if they knew I had started desert before the main course, a sponge shaft would be the least of my worries. So lets peel back the tin-foil on the main dish and see what’s on offer.

 

I’ll try and explain how this felt. Imagine being a twelve year old boy Richard. Now imagine it’s Christmas morning and you’re sat their with your final present to open. It’s a big one, and you know what it is. It’s that Goodmans stereo you picked out the catalogue and wrote to Santa about.

 

Only you open the present and it’s not in there. It’s your hamster Richard. It’s your hamster in the box and it’s not breathing. That’s how I felt when I peeled back the foil and saw this: [see image 3, above].

 

Andy

[Silver Surfer/AKAButters]

That's funny.

[Francois_Dumas]

I had to look up quite a few of the words used by the honorable gentleman, but FUNNY it is... and sad.....

[Dave McReynolds]

I can't top that one, but I did spend a lot of time on airplanes over the last week. I don't travel that much anymore, so I'm sensitive to the changes. Like getting a nice low "A" number on Southwest since I got my boarding pass the night before, so I was able to get my favorite seat in the emergency exit row with lots of extra leg and arm room. Only to discover once in the air that the seat cushions were totally worn out, so I spent the whole 4 hour flight slowly sliding down toward the floor, and pushing myself back up in the seat. Oh well, I guess that's to be expected, since it's probably everybody else's favorite seat too!

[Les is more]

That really does take the biscuit. Thanks for the laugh!

[Agent_Orange]

"Yes," said Yossarian. "He poisoned the squadron."

 

Milo went pale again. "He did what?"

 

"He mashed hundreds of cakes of GI soap into the sweet potatoes just to show that people have the taste of Philistines and don't know the difference between good and bad. Every man in the squadron was sick. Missions were cancelled."

 

"Well!" Milo exclaimed, with thin-lipped disapproval. "He certainly found out how wrong he was, didn't he?"

 

"On the contrary," Yossarian corrected. "He found out how right he was. We packed it away by the plateful and clamored for more."

 

[Gary in Aus]

Not a passenger complaint but a fairly good letter , this has been doing the rounds for a while and this is the sanitised version ,

 

http://forum.pulsar.org.au/printthread.php?t=30008