And on a happy note...

[CraigC]

And on a happy note…the wife has left the house to run errands and I’m enjoying the quiet with the company of our two boxers asleep on the floor next to me. Despite the economic woes (and I hope all of you are coping), I’m thinking how fortunate I am to experience love, friendships, good health, this board and, for the moment, the means to enjoy family and life. Perhaps the following has been posted before, but I recently “discovered” these words that seem right for the season and, for me, a reminder to appreciate life. Best wishes to all you.

 

(You Tube version by Baz Luhrmann

)

 

 

Everybody's Free (to wear sunscreen)

 

Mary Schmich

Chicago Tribune

 

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '97... wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.

 

The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.

 

I will dispense this advice now.

 

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.

 

You are NOT as fat as you imagine.

 

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

 

Do one thing every day that scares you.

 

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

 

Floss.

 

Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.

 

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

 

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

 

Stretch.

 

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

 

Get plenty of calcium.

 

Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.

 

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

 

Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

 

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

 

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

 

Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.

 

Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

 

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

 

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

 

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

 

Respect your elders.

 

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

 

Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.

 

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

 

[IRPUK]

Can I suggest this version instead....

 

.....to the same tune.....

 

 

 

Ladies and Gentlemen.....wear Leather.

 

(Author Unknown)

 

 

 

If I could offer you only one tip for improving your life, leather would be it.

 

The long term benefits of leather have been proved by serious bikers over many highways and many years, whereas wearing something unreliable like shorts and flipflops means you will experience a trip to the emergency room. There, uncaring nurses will scrub gravel out of your wounds, and doctors will dispense ineffective painkillers and meaningless advice... like telling you to trade that "murdercycle" in for a Camry.

 

Bull****. I will dispense some real advice right now:

 

Enjoy the power and beauty of your ride; If you don't already; you can fully enjoy it by doing block-long smokey burnouts in the parking lot at the local drive-in.

 

Trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at the photos of you and your pals on your bikes and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much fun you had and how fabulous you really looked hauling ass down the highway dressed in leather.

 

Leather is as sexy as you imagine.

 

Don't worry about what your Mom thinks; or worry, but know that worrying about what other people think is as effective as trying to scratch your nose in a blinding hailstorm at 80 m.p.h. with a full- face helmet and winter gloves on. The real troubles in your life are apt to be Volvo stationwagons, driven by some dipstick talking into his cell phone or doing her makeup; the kind that blindside you at 4 PM on some urban roadway and then claim you crashed into THEM.

 

Do one thing everyday that scares other drivers... Lanesplit.

 

Sing into your helmet. Use mouthwash first.

 

Don't be reckless with other people's bikes, especially if you don't have insurance. Don't put up with people who mess with yours.... in fact, beat them with a chain.

 

Ride Fast.

 

Don't waste your money on chrome, or fancy paintjobs; spend it on racing or partying. Sometimes you're fast, sometimes you're slow. Sometimes you're hungover. The ride is long, and in the end, a cold beer tastes pretty damn good.

 

Remember the good rides you've had, forget the cuts and bruises; try to wear out the sides of your tires before the middle.... if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

 

Keep your oil changed, throw away old traffic citations.

 

Take chances.

 

Don't feel guilty if you ride faster than the posted limit ...the most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 how to ride conservatively, all the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

 

Get plenty of saddle time.

 

Be kind to your passengers, you'll miss them if they fall off.

 

Maybe you'll crash, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have surgery, maybe you won't, maybe you'll ride a cruiser off a cliff doing 40, maybe you'll get a new motocrosser for your 75th birthday ...whatever you ride, don't congratulate yourself too much - your choices are 90% foreign,10% domestic, so are everyone else's.

 

Enjoy your bike, use it every way you can...don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument of pleasure you'll ever own, not counting porn sites and a fast modem.

 

Wrench... even if you have nowhere to do it but in your hotel room.

 

Read the owner's manual, even tho' you won't remember any of it.

 

Do not read American motorcycle magazines, they will only make you wish you'd bought a British one instead.

 

Get to know your brake pads, you never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your tires; they are your link to the pavement and the things most likely to save your butt from a nasty highside.

 

Understand that mechanics comes and mechanics go, but for a precious talented few you should pay them well and buy them sixpacks. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older your bike gets, the more you'll need the mechanic who worked on it when it was young and still not paid off.

 

Ride in New York City once, but leave before you get killed; ride in Northern California whenever possible, but leave a plausible excuse when calling in sick for work.

 

Do lurid wheelies.

 

Accept certain inalienable truths: prices will rise, traffic will get worse, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young, gasoline was cheap, the highway patrol couldn't catch you, and Harley owners weren't all yuppies.

 

Respect your rev-limiter.

 

Don't expect anyone else to see your bike unless it has really loud pipes.

 

Maybe your bike has a big gas tank, maybe a smaller one; but remember, either way you'll have to make bathroom stops.

 

Don't mess too much with your carburetors, or by the time you're done, you'll be walking home.

 

Be careful whose advice you buy, and save your receipts. Don't take advice from those who supply it for free, especially if they own a Britbike.

 

Motorcycle restoration is a form of self-torture. Doing it is a way of pulling the past from the dustbin, degreasing it, painting over the rusty parts and dumping way more money into it than it's worth.

 

But trust me on the leather...

 

 

 

 

[Dave McReynolds]

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

 

The only possibility I could recommend to Mary as a way that she could succeed in doing this would be a sex change operation. Maybe Mother Teresa could "forget the insults," but on the other hand, maybe she never got insulted. I've never heard of another woman who could do that.

[Dennis Andress]

Don't mess too much with your carburetors, or by the time you're done, you'll be walking home.

 

 

 

[yabadabapal]

Great stuff Craig. And true!