Week 2 Friday - Bmweerman

[bmweerman]

Ever heard of ICU psychosis? The nurses told me about it several days ago, said it was common in patients that were in ICU for extended periods of time. General disorientation is the big symptom and Cameron is well into it.

 

It's so frustrating and scary when I'm with him. He dozes off, then a few minutes later he'll wake up and try to get out of bed, or ask where his clothes are so he can leave. He wonders what the tubes are about and wants them removed. I go through the litany of why he's there, he can't get out of bed due to his injuries, etc. Sometimes he gets angry when I tell him he can't do these things. It takes a little while for him to understand his situation, then he dozes off and we do it all over again. When I leave tonight, I told the nurse to tie his hands so he doesn't do anything to himself. We did it last night too as he kept "playfully" pulling at his tubes and smiling.

 

Aside from that, he's doing better. They're planning to remove him from the ventilator Sunday so are slowly weaning him from it. His lungs are getting clearer and it seems like maybe his side isn't quite as sore, but that's hard to tell.

 

This new behavior is driving me nuts. I took a drive today and took some pictures of the road I came in on. I'll post them once I get a solid time on the computer. Yes, he keeps asking for it, then falls asleep. When I take it he wakes up and demands it back.

 

I just got on his case for putting his leg out of bed and trying to what looked like get up, he told me he hates me. I know he doesn't mean it,but it still hurts. I'm just trying to keep him alive. He tries to communicate, but can't and I get frustrated that I can't help him. I need to go to my room and get away from this. There's an event in town this weekend that I'm going to go to so I'm not here so much. I can only take short periods before I feel totally overwhelmed.

[Eschelon1]

Wow, that's gotta be tough. Sounds like things are healing up though. I know it can be awful too, to cooped up in a hospital bed. After I got back stateside from Desert Storm(I) I was in the hospital for some minor medical problems. For three days all they did were tests & interviews. That was all I could stand. On the 3rd night, I packed my bag, put on my sweats and snuck out when the nurses weren't looking. I didn't get caught (Technically they could have charged my with awol).

 

I haven't been back to this day. And I'm fine. 'cept for the skin rashes...and the voices in my head.....

 

[BeniciaRT_GT]

Patti,

 

I appreciate so much your sharing this with us. I've just started catching up on the board after Torrey and the workweek, and as sorry as I am to hear about what Y'all are going though, I also feel a little better thinking that you can get some support from this family here.

 

I'm sure you will have a lot of guilty feelings about not being by his side all the time, but you really need to take care of yourself too. Otherwise you can't be there for him in a real way, reguardless if you are there physically. Please take care of yourself, decompress often, and rembember he doesn't hate you. Speaking of that, it may be a long way to full recovery, but it will get easier over the next week I think. Once the vent is out, and he can breathe a little easier, he'll also start coming around to normal. He may be a little cranky, but at least soon he should be himself, just still injured.

 

I don't know what most of us can do this far away, but please know there are a lot of us here and I've seen this group pull off some amazing feats. We really do care, and I hope it helps; not just your talking/writing about it, but knowing that we truly care and want to help support you in both of your times of need.

[eddd]

I think you are doing a fantastic job under extremely trying circumstance. I'm glad you have a good medical staff there that take the time to explain why Cameron is doing some of the things he does. Things should start improving more each day. The mind is kind...after this is over many of painful times will be but distant memories.

[Ghostdad]

I don't post often but I have been following your updates constantly, I just wanted to say how amazing you are for having the love and strength to handle this situation as well as you are.. This is one of the hardest things in life to go through, having someone you love in the hospital and knowing there is only soo much that you personnaly can do for them in their time of need.

Just hang in there you are doing wonderfully under the circumstances. And remember it is this situation he hates not you. He is a very lucky man to have you by his side. So hang in there times will get better, and be sure to take care of yourself.

Remember you have a lot of people pulling for you and wishing you the strength and encouragement to weather this storm..

 

Wishing you my best..

Dave

[Lynn]

I haven't posted often-but I wanted to let you know that our thoughts are still with both of you. I appreciate all of the updates.

 

My dad was in the hospital for quite a while when I was a kid-he rolled his truck and burned it. We had the same problems. Whenever he is on narcotics, he gets angry, upset, and a lot nuts. For several weeks in there, he was convinced that we were all living in our car. ??? And kept trying to slug the nurses. He was convinced they were trying to take the car. The last time he was in for surgery, he actually succeeded in hitting a nurse (reason 64 million that nurses should be paid really, really well). Gave the poor guy a nasty black eye. I felt bad every time I saw him.

 

Heck-last time I was given morphine, my mom called and I kept telling her about the long discussions I was having with my (dead) grandmother.

 

It is upsetting. And frustrating. I never heard it called ICU psychosis-but it seems reasonable that, when you add all the disorientation, the frustration and a good dose of painkillers and sedatives, you can get someone acting entirely out of character.

[Mike O]

Patti,

 

Progress is progress. And Sunday will be a BIG day for Cameron. Might suggest you take some much needed time off today since, it will be a busy one tomorrow and Monday.

 

You're still in our thoughts and prayers and I routinely check back here to get updates not only of Camerons medical condition but to get a sense for how you're holding up. I know folks have probably told you this, but a month from now, you'll be looking past all this and towards more normality.

 

Chin up...

 

Mike O

[lawnchairboy]

seen alot of trauma and alot of ICU patients, the pyschosis is common and disturbing to watch. I'm encouraged by what you are reporting, I hope he is outta there soon.

 

chris